Before I write a long drawn out blog about out week... I want to take some time to just be thankful!!
Dear God,
Thank you soooooooo very much for our amazing week away!!!
You gave us the snow that we wanted...you gave us good times and awesome memories. I took over 400 pictures to prove that one!
Our basic needs were met the entire week... and we all managed to live! LOL!!
Everyone stayed safe.
Everyone had fun.
I heard great giggles from my kids as they had TONS of fun on sleds, the snowmobiles, and just being knee deep in snow playing!
We had a great hunting adventure.. and got to see some pretty cool things! And even tho Stacy didnt get that deer... I am glad he had the chance to hunt in knee deep snow and track that deer all over the mountain... too bad his gun didnt fire any of the 7 times he was face to face with that lucky deer!! ;-)
(By the way... I LOVE Mtn Laurel... It is beautiful... but geez, that stuff really grabs ya and pulls ya down!! LOL)
I had all 4 of my kids together, with us, on Christmas Eve and Christmas day.
My grandparents were able to share in our traditions for this Holiday....and they both seemed to enjoy that. Neither of them imagined they would be up in that cabin with their GREAT Grandchildren!
I am very grateful for Carol taking Gunner for the week... he had awesome care and I didnt have to worry about him at all. (Although I did worry if he was having a nervous break down because we left him...lol) I am also thankful that they openly give us advice about him... because I just dont know!
I know there are TONS of other little things I am forgetting to mention here... But I know that I made sure to say "Thank you" as they happened!
~Amy
Saturday, December 29, 2012
Wednesday, December 19, 2012
So much...
So much is going on... I dont know where to begin! And really... I'm not even sure where my head is at.
I am still waiting on MRI results for my knee... the good thing is, it hasnt been bothering me as much as it was before. I have been really careful about what I do.
I have seen my pain management Dr... I have been in to see my PCP... I have been to about every Dr I have!! Just trying to cover all bases. LOL
We are at a stand still with getting Courtney into HGA... which really pisses me off!!! The person in charge of doing her eligibility seems to have her thumb up her ass and is taking her time. I am losing hope on an April start for Courtney.
We all (us, the kids, Josh, his g/f, and Stacy's parents) went to Christmas Village last weekend. It was amazing to see!! It was a really good time... and even getting lost on the way home! LOL
It is getting close to our week away for Christmas!!! The next few days I will be packing and preparing. They are calling for snow up there... this weekend!!! I am hoping it dumps enough on us to make our trip FUN! Stacy and Brittany have plans of doing some late season muzzle loader hunting while up there. Maybe they can get a deer yet! :-)
Yesterday was a long day.
The kids went to the CCA sponsored Science Day. They LOVED it!
While they were doing that... I went to visit my Dad and Linda. Unfortunately, Linda is back in the hospital. :-(
It was really hard seeing her the way she is right now. Soooo bruised from ppl touching her too hard and trying to get IV's in and blood taken. I dont understand how those in the medical field cant be a little more gentle!!!
I guess when you do these things day in and day out... you just get numb to the fact that your touch could be causing someone else pain and bruising.
Whenever they use tape on her... it just peels her skin away right with it.
I will say that her Aid for at home (Lucy) is AMAZING!! They are lucky to have someone that truly does care! When Lucy came in, she got more of a reaction from Linda than anyone else!!! BUT... there I was trying to be quiet. NOT Lucy. Her loudness and positive energy filled that room real quick!!!
I guess I dont have to be so quiet...LOL!
After my visit I ran back and picked up the kids... then headed to my grandparents for a bit before I had to pick Stacy up from work.
My grandfather told me he has mesothelioma. He said it so calm and carefree. Well, it hit me like a ton of bricks!!!
My grandfather makes me freakin crazy. He is hyper and sometimes just plain nutty. BUT... he raised me. He was the closest think to a father I had. He always made sure I had everything I needed and he was always the one to come through when I needed someone the most. He paid my way through Catholic School... helped me buy my first car... helped me establish credit of my own... EVEN when I was tossed out by my mom and grandmother! He would sneak behind everyone's back to make sure me and my kids werent suffering without some basic needs being met.
Even still... When we clearly dont need his help... it makes him feel better to buy the kids a pair of shoes or hunting gear... or anything their little hearts desire to spoil them.
And it means the world to him to have been so involved in his GREAT grandchildren's lives.... hunting, watching them grow up, taking them to camp every year even tho there is fighting and bickering and he stresses so much about meals... LOL! (We were just arguing yesterday over his need to plan out every single meal for next week!! He stresses about this shit WAY too much!!! It will all come together... we camp all of the time...we got this!)
He may be a nut case... but he is the most selfless person I have met. Even approaching his 80's... he is STILL taking care of those around him.... Neighbors, sister in law... my loser, piece of shit mother who sucks the life out of EVERYONE she can. NONE of those ppl care about him or his needs. Even with a DX of mesothelioma... the phone still rings at his house... people wanting him to help them in some way or another. (Mostly my asshole mother) I am sure she is looking at this as an opportunity for him to get more money... so he can continue to pay ALL of her bills. (I HATE HER)
Even my grandmother treats my grandfather poorly. And it pisses me off. (Dont get me wrong... the man does get on a person's nerves... rather quickly.) Her solution is for him to just shut his mouth. But, I think she is in denial. Or they just have no clue what this disease really is. Well, I know my grandfather does... because he was a bit choked up when he started talking about getting the kids out hunting with him next year... he wants to get them out for the youth seasons... so he can say he hunting with 3 of his great grandchildren! (Thank God for my awesome husband... who is going to see what we need to do to get him a senior license, so we can get him more places in the truck... and he wont have to walk as much, since he has been falling in the mountains more)
So yea... I am pretty devastated. And I have to find a way to explain all of this to my kids. And stay strong for them. And myself.
I know I dont talk to him every day... but I know he is there. I cant imagine a point in life when he isnt. He raised me. He is the closest thing to a father I have ever had. And he was the only grandfather I ever had.
I guess I should go start packing and cooking for our Christmas at camp...
I am still waiting on MRI results for my knee... the good thing is, it hasnt been bothering me as much as it was before. I have been really careful about what I do.
I have seen my pain management Dr... I have been in to see my PCP... I have been to about every Dr I have!! Just trying to cover all bases. LOL
We are at a stand still with getting Courtney into HGA... which really pisses me off!!! The person in charge of doing her eligibility seems to have her thumb up her ass and is taking her time. I am losing hope on an April start for Courtney.
We all (us, the kids, Josh, his g/f, and Stacy's parents) went to Christmas Village last weekend. It was amazing to see!! It was a really good time... and even getting lost on the way home! LOL
It is getting close to our week away for Christmas!!! The next few days I will be packing and preparing. They are calling for snow up there... this weekend!!! I am hoping it dumps enough on us to make our trip FUN! Stacy and Brittany have plans of doing some late season muzzle loader hunting while up there. Maybe they can get a deer yet! :-)
Yesterday was a long day.
The kids went to the CCA sponsored Science Day. They LOVED it!
While they were doing that... I went to visit my Dad and Linda. Unfortunately, Linda is back in the hospital. :-(
It was really hard seeing her the way she is right now. Soooo bruised from ppl touching her too hard and trying to get IV's in and blood taken. I dont understand how those in the medical field cant be a little more gentle!!!
I guess when you do these things day in and day out... you just get numb to the fact that your touch could be causing someone else pain and bruising.
Whenever they use tape on her... it just peels her skin away right with it.
I will say that her Aid for at home (Lucy) is AMAZING!! They are lucky to have someone that truly does care! When Lucy came in, she got more of a reaction from Linda than anyone else!!! BUT... there I was trying to be quiet. NOT Lucy. Her loudness and positive energy filled that room real quick!!!
I guess I dont have to be so quiet...LOL!
After my visit I ran back and picked up the kids... then headed to my grandparents for a bit before I had to pick Stacy up from work.
My grandfather told me he has mesothelioma. He said it so calm and carefree. Well, it hit me like a ton of bricks!!!
My grandfather makes me freakin crazy. He is hyper and sometimes just plain nutty. BUT... he raised me. He was the closest think to a father I had. He always made sure I had everything I needed and he was always the one to come through when I needed someone the most. He paid my way through Catholic School... helped me buy my first car... helped me establish credit of my own... EVEN when I was tossed out by my mom and grandmother! He would sneak behind everyone's back to make sure me and my kids werent suffering without some basic needs being met.
Even still... When we clearly dont need his help... it makes him feel better to buy the kids a pair of shoes or hunting gear... or anything their little hearts desire to spoil them.
And it means the world to him to have been so involved in his GREAT grandchildren's lives.... hunting, watching them grow up, taking them to camp every year even tho there is fighting and bickering and he stresses so much about meals... LOL! (We were just arguing yesterday over his need to plan out every single meal for next week!! He stresses about this shit WAY too much!!! It will all come together... we camp all of the time...we got this!)
He may be a nut case... but he is the most selfless person I have met. Even approaching his 80's... he is STILL taking care of those around him.... Neighbors, sister in law... my loser, piece of shit mother who sucks the life out of EVERYONE she can. NONE of those ppl care about him or his needs. Even with a DX of mesothelioma... the phone still rings at his house... people wanting him to help them in some way or another. (Mostly my asshole mother) I am sure she is looking at this as an opportunity for him to get more money... so he can continue to pay ALL of her bills. (I HATE HER)
Even my grandmother treats my grandfather poorly. And it pisses me off. (Dont get me wrong... the man does get on a person's nerves... rather quickly.) Her solution is for him to just shut his mouth. But, I think she is in denial. Or they just have no clue what this disease really is. Well, I know my grandfather does... because he was a bit choked up when he started talking about getting the kids out hunting with him next year... he wants to get them out for the youth seasons... so he can say he hunting with 3 of his great grandchildren! (Thank God for my awesome husband... who is going to see what we need to do to get him a senior license, so we can get him more places in the truck... and he wont have to walk as much, since he has been falling in the mountains more)
So yea... I am pretty devastated. And I have to find a way to explain all of this to my kids. And stay strong for them. And myself.
I know I dont talk to him every day... but I know he is there. I cant imagine a point in life when he isnt. He raised me. He is the closest thing to a father I have ever had. And he was the only grandfather I ever had.
I guess I should go start packing and cooking for our Christmas at camp...
Tuesday, December 11, 2012
Quick run down
It has been a busy week around here!
I had the "joy" of going through a hip arthrogram... wouldnt recommend you adding that to any bucket list!! LOL!
Had another Ortho appt... to be told my hip is fine... but my knee is messed! (GO FIGURE... I think I have been telling them my knee is far worse). Now the Dr wants to do knee surgery ASAP!
I am no on his surgery schedule until Jan 23... but they insisted on putting me on the cancellation list. BUT...I am tellin ya ... there is NO WAY I will be having surgery before our Christmas week at the cabin!!!!!!!!!
I go see my pain management Dr today... and my Chiropractor. Between the 2 of them I am sure we can find a way to get me through to the end of the year!
I also have an MRI of my knee tomorrow.
Courtney managed to get a stomach bug. The girl NEVER gets sick... so this was a real learning experience for her!! She is doing better today... Just gotta get some food in her now.
I am hoping the complete disinfecting of our house will keep that germ from spreading to everyone else in the house.
Other than that...
We are just counting down the day until we head up to camp! :-)
Next week I will start my portion of the cooking and baking. And then packing.
I am pretty excited!! We even figure out a way to rig up heat in the out house! LOL!!
NOW... if it will just SNOW... all will be good!!!!!!!!
I am still hard at work on my photography classes!! I LOVE them!!!! I am glad the sun is shining today... I have some assignments to get done.... in between Dr appts.
Well... that is the short and sweet version of what is going on around here. I gotta run... gotta get some things done before I have to head out!
I had the "joy" of going through a hip arthrogram... wouldnt recommend you adding that to any bucket list!! LOL!
Had another Ortho appt... to be told my hip is fine... but my knee is messed! (GO FIGURE... I think I have been telling them my knee is far worse). Now the Dr wants to do knee surgery ASAP!
I am no on his surgery schedule until Jan 23... but they insisted on putting me on the cancellation list. BUT...I am tellin ya ... there is NO WAY I will be having surgery before our Christmas week at the cabin!!!!!!!!!
I go see my pain management Dr today... and my Chiropractor. Between the 2 of them I am sure we can find a way to get me through to the end of the year!
I also have an MRI of my knee tomorrow.
Courtney managed to get a stomach bug. The girl NEVER gets sick... so this was a real learning experience for her!! She is doing better today... Just gotta get some food in her now.
I am hoping the complete disinfecting of our house will keep that germ from spreading to everyone else in the house.
Other than that...
We are just counting down the day until we head up to camp! :-)
Next week I will start my portion of the cooking and baking. And then packing.
I am pretty excited!! We even figure out a way to rig up heat in the out house! LOL!!
NOW... if it will just SNOW... all will be good!!!!!!!!
I am still hard at work on my photography classes!! I LOVE them!!!! I am glad the sun is shining today... I have some assignments to get done.... in between Dr appts.
Well... that is the short and sweet version of what is going on around here. I gotta run... gotta get some things done before I have to head out!
Tuesday, December 4, 2012
Going ons...
The time sure is flying by me! It's as tho in a blink, 3 days have past!!
We did our "mini" decorating this year. Since we wont be home the entire week of Christmas, I didnt want to go full bore, like usual. So instead... we bought a small potted tree with little red bows from WalMart, and added battery powered lights! It is cute... and gives us the feeling of the season. I also put out my small ceramic tree and of course, Stacy put up some outside lights. Just not is typical display. We are taking some to camp with us to decorate some of the outside pine trees!! :-)
Stacy got the snowmobiles mostly cleaned off. It was pretty sad that they were stored like they were and completely covered in shit! Once we get them registered and legal to run on state game lands... they are gonna be stored in our garage. Buck's buddies will have to find other snowmobiles to run... since Buck surely doesnt need them. He has 2 new ones... and only 1 ass to sit on them!
Muddy River K-9 Academy has agreed to take Gunner for the week we will be gone over Christmas!! I am soooo very thankful!! He will be safe and well taken care of... and get a bit of training!! And I wont have to worry about him trying to eat my grandfather! RELIEF!! I am kinda sad that he wont be with me. He is my right hand man for all things outside... and alot of inside too! I will miss him. But, the break will do us both some good! THANK GOD, for Tim and Carol... I wouldnt trust ANYONE else with him!
The puppies will also be spending that week away!!! They will be hanging out with one of the potential new families! ;-) It will be a trial run for them... and help them decide who, if any, they are up for! AND... it will be 2 less little bodies I will have to worry about while at camp! :-) I am hoping that when we get back, this family decided to take them BOTH... I would really hate to see them separated... and I am ready for them to go into homes now.
I started this years ORNAMENTS!!! OMG... they are turning out far better than I could have expected!!! They are beautiful!!! I LOVE THEM!! And, 4 yrs later... I am finally finding ornaments that can use all of the big glass balls we had for our wedding reception! ;-)
I spent the afternoon yesterday cleaning out my truck...and washing it!! I am about sick of ppl leaving their shit in there! ESPECIALLY the ratchet strap fiasco that always ends up under my back seats!!! It took me about 45 minutes to detangle and wrap them up... and put them where they belong!! That is insane! My husband really needs to start cleaning up after himself! I am tired of doing.
Anyway... My truck is all pretty... for now! Cant wait to get my new organizing pieces for in there!
The weather yesterday was wonderful!! I was very happy to get to be outside. I wanted to get some pictures for my classes... but I got caught up in cleaning my truck. The sun was down before I knew it.
As for my classes... I signed up for another through PennTech. Which makes 2 now. If I handle them well... I will be enrolling in NYIP full program! I just want to make sure I can manage it all first.
I am also working on making some changes around the house... to accommodate some time without kids up my ass. Some expectations have changes around here. And, with the help of the therapist the kids are seeing.... I am hoping we see some positive results!!
We are requiring Nathan participate in his skating lessons from now on!! Not just when he feels like it... and we dont care if he likes being part of the show or not. He seems to want to pull out of ALL things "kid"... and at 11... that just isnt an option! He seems to think he is an adult in an 11 yr old body... and it is starting to have some negative results! I like that he is smart... and I want him to be able to try and experience new things... but I think I want a little far. Soooo... time to fix it!
I am still having trouble with my knee and hip. I scored a real fun hip MRI for this Thursday!! Cant wait... LOL!
My knee has been KILLING me tho... and all they keep doing is handing me more steroids!! It is starting to piss me off... and cause me to blow up like a balloon!!! NOT COOL!
It has been 3 weeks since my "slide" on the trail... time to figure this shit out!
I guess I should be thankful it isnt my back.... and I am. I am just tired of being in pain.
OK... I guess that about covers most of life... for now. I gotta get some laundry done and do some sort of straightening up around here. Clutter is taking over.
We did our "mini" decorating this year. Since we wont be home the entire week of Christmas, I didnt want to go full bore, like usual. So instead... we bought a small potted tree with little red bows from WalMart, and added battery powered lights! It is cute... and gives us the feeling of the season. I also put out my small ceramic tree and of course, Stacy put up some outside lights. Just not is typical display. We are taking some to camp with us to decorate some of the outside pine trees!! :-)
Stacy got the snowmobiles mostly cleaned off. It was pretty sad that they were stored like they were and completely covered in shit! Once we get them registered and legal to run on state game lands... they are gonna be stored in our garage. Buck's buddies will have to find other snowmobiles to run... since Buck surely doesnt need them. He has 2 new ones... and only 1 ass to sit on them!
Muddy River K-9 Academy has agreed to take Gunner for the week we will be gone over Christmas!! I am soooo very thankful!! He will be safe and well taken care of... and get a bit of training!! And I wont have to worry about him trying to eat my grandfather! RELIEF!! I am kinda sad that he wont be with me. He is my right hand man for all things outside... and alot of inside too! I will miss him. But, the break will do us both some good! THANK GOD, for Tim and Carol... I wouldnt trust ANYONE else with him!
The puppies will also be spending that week away!!! They will be hanging out with one of the potential new families! ;-) It will be a trial run for them... and help them decide who, if any, they are up for! AND... it will be 2 less little bodies I will have to worry about while at camp! :-) I am hoping that when we get back, this family decided to take them BOTH... I would really hate to see them separated... and I am ready for them to go into homes now.
I started this years ORNAMENTS!!! OMG... they are turning out far better than I could have expected!!! They are beautiful!!! I LOVE THEM!! And, 4 yrs later... I am finally finding ornaments that can use all of the big glass balls we had for our wedding reception! ;-)
I spent the afternoon yesterday cleaning out my truck...and washing it!! I am about sick of ppl leaving their shit in there! ESPECIALLY the ratchet strap fiasco that always ends up under my back seats!!! It took me about 45 minutes to detangle and wrap them up... and put them where they belong!! That is insane! My husband really needs to start cleaning up after himself! I am tired of doing.
Anyway... My truck is all pretty... for now! Cant wait to get my new organizing pieces for in there!
The weather yesterday was wonderful!! I was very happy to get to be outside. I wanted to get some pictures for my classes... but I got caught up in cleaning my truck. The sun was down before I knew it.
As for my classes... I signed up for another through PennTech. Which makes 2 now. If I handle them well... I will be enrolling in NYIP full program! I just want to make sure I can manage it all first.
I am also working on making some changes around the house... to accommodate some time without kids up my ass. Some expectations have changes around here. And, with the help of the therapist the kids are seeing.... I am hoping we see some positive results!!
We are requiring Nathan participate in his skating lessons from now on!! Not just when he feels like it... and we dont care if he likes being part of the show or not. He seems to want to pull out of ALL things "kid"... and at 11... that just isnt an option! He seems to think he is an adult in an 11 yr old body... and it is starting to have some negative results! I like that he is smart... and I want him to be able to try and experience new things... but I think I want a little far. Soooo... time to fix it!
I am still having trouble with my knee and hip. I scored a real fun hip MRI for this Thursday!! Cant wait... LOL!
My knee has been KILLING me tho... and all they keep doing is handing me more steroids!! It is starting to piss me off... and cause me to blow up like a balloon!!! NOT COOL!
It has been 3 weeks since my "slide" on the trail... time to figure this shit out!
I guess I should be thankful it isnt my back.... and I am. I am just tired of being in pain.
OK... I guess that about covers most of life... for now. I gotta get some laundry done and do some sort of straightening up around here. Clutter is taking over.
Wednesday, November 28, 2012
Christmas!!
I have been in a bit of a "funk" lately. Between back and knee pain... and then all of the steroids... OUCH! It wasnt making me the most pleasant of ppl, to say the least!
I think it is getting better... as least today...LOL!!
I did ALL of our Christmas shopping!! OK, MOST...LOL!! Just a few more little things to pick up... but for the most part, the kids are DONE! We are keeping Christmas on the smaller side this year... since we are taking a week long trip to the cabin. I would rather put our "Christmas money" to use on the experiences and family time of that week... and pay less attention to the material side of the Holiday. Christmas... and most Holidays really... have turned into such a money racket. I hate the message it sends. So, this year we are switching it up! Let's hope it all works out for the best!!
For our trip... I (painfully) decided to board Gunner! My grandfather isnt too keen on Gunner... because Gunner does not like him. Sooo... I have asked Tim and Carol to keep him. I wouldnt trust anyone else!!! We are working out all of the details... and I think it will do us all some good! Even though I will be SUPER sad without him.
The puppies had their first vet appt today!! They received their first shots and got a clean bill of health! They are all ready to find fur-ever homes!!
Carrey came over this morning and gave Brittany a massage!! Brittany LOVED it... she is still saying how "AMAZING" it was!! She said she feels like she is floating on a cloud... no tension at all. The best she has felt after a grueling gymnastic night!
Added bonus... I got to hang out with Lexi! I LOVE that she comes to me and talks to me now!!! :-) But Nathan is still her favorite...LOL!
OMG... she did THE CUTEST little "skating move" today... butt first, just like the figure skaters do!! It was pretty darn amazing... I was impressed!!
Adult convo is always nice too... especially with the crappy mood I have been in lately. UGH!
I scored a HUGE deal on my new PhotoShop software today!!! Found a cyber Monday week promo code!! 40% off!!! :-) It pays to be patient and research!!!
So yeah... I am pretty happy today! Plus tonite I have some plans... soooo all is good. Still SUPER pissed at my hubby about the speeding ticket tho!!! Grrr
Oh... I want to send out some love and prayers to my oldest and dearest... TINA! The girl just cant catch a break. She is having some surgery today... thankfully it is pretty easy and routine and she should be back home in a day or so! Her speech is sounding so much better now, since her stroke... I LOVE hearing that voice of hers!!! I just love her. <3 Anyway... thoughts, love, and prayers for a speedy recovery!
I think it is getting better... as least today...LOL!!
I did ALL of our Christmas shopping!! OK, MOST...LOL!! Just a few more little things to pick up... but for the most part, the kids are DONE! We are keeping Christmas on the smaller side this year... since we are taking a week long trip to the cabin. I would rather put our "Christmas money" to use on the experiences and family time of that week... and pay less attention to the material side of the Holiday. Christmas... and most Holidays really... have turned into such a money racket. I hate the message it sends. So, this year we are switching it up! Let's hope it all works out for the best!!
For our trip... I (painfully) decided to board Gunner! My grandfather isnt too keen on Gunner... because Gunner does not like him. Sooo... I have asked Tim and Carol to keep him. I wouldnt trust anyone else!!! We are working out all of the details... and I think it will do us all some good! Even though I will be SUPER sad without him.
The puppies had their first vet appt today!! They received their first shots and got a clean bill of health! They are all ready to find fur-ever homes!!
Carrey came over this morning and gave Brittany a massage!! Brittany LOVED it... she is still saying how "AMAZING" it was!! She said she feels like she is floating on a cloud... no tension at all. The best she has felt after a grueling gymnastic night!
Added bonus... I got to hang out with Lexi! I LOVE that she comes to me and talks to me now!!! :-) But Nathan is still her favorite...LOL!
OMG... she did THE CUTEST little "skating move" today... butt first, just like the figure skaters do!! It was pretty darn amazing... I was impressed!!
Adult convo is always nice too... especially with the crappy mood I have been in lately. UGH!
I scored a HUGE deal on my new PhotoShop software today!!! Found a cyber Monday week promo code!! 40% off!!! :-) It pays to be patient and research!!!
So yeah... I am pretty happy today! Plus tonite I have some plans... soooo all is good. Still SUPER pissed at my hubby about the speeding ticket tho!!! Grrr
Oh... I want to send out some love and prayers to my oldest and dearest... TINA! The girl just cant catch a break. She is having some surgery today... thankfully it is pretty easy and routine and she should be back home in a day or so! Her speech is sounding so much better now, since her stroke... I LOVE hearing that voice of hers!!! I just love her. <3 Anyway... thoughts, love, and prayers for a speedy recovery!
Tuesday, November 27, 2012
Our first snow!!
Yep... that fun, white stuff is falling from the sky!!! I am fairly excited about it... I want TONS of snow this year. Not sure exactly why... but I do. Just something about it feels "homey" and "peaceful". I need as much PEACEFUL as I can get my hands on!!!
The only thing missing is my Amaruq watching it fall... and then finding all the spunk he has left in his body and going out to run in it!! :-( I miss him bunches.
No school delay for Courtney... I am FOREVER thankful for that one. She was working on my last nerve, since she had off for well over a week!!!
And YES... since Courtney REFUSED to find out when her first day back at school was... way early last week when I asked her to. I let her butt get up, get dressed and go out to wait for the bus YESTERDAY!!! Knowing full well she didnt have school!!!! Seems mean... I know. BUT... it was a lesson in being responsible for her OWN life and schedule! It did end up turning into an argument... and she wanted ME to be blamed for HER lack of being responsible! NOT!!!
We are still having the "GET A JOB" battle too!!! Yea, that was another messy argument last night.
Stacy got himself yet ANOTHER speeding ticket on Sunday. 2nd one in a month!!! AND, he tried to hide it from me!!!! WTF!?!? I am pretty pissed off about it. I am tired of wasting money to pay them. It isnt a hard concept... DRIVE THE SPEED LIMIT!!! I told him... one more... and he is gonna need to find a new damn home! I REFUSE to add "Stacy's speeding tickets" to our monthly budget... it is just bullshit now! To think... he had the balls to bitch at Josh about speeding!!! Hmmmm... maybe Josh learned it by watching Stacy! I mean really... do as I say, not as I do... just doesnt cut it in the world of parenting. GRRRR!
My knee is giving me one hell of a time. In addition to the steroid injection I got just over a week ago... I am now on oral steroids. I am not real happy about it. They tend to make me crabby... and I really dont need any other reason to be crabby. I mean really... look at my life!
My class is going GREAT! I LOVE IT!!! I am chomping at the bit to enroll in the other school option. But, I am really trying to hold off. (Gotta keep up with Stacy's fines first... the asshole).
Anyway... still making excellent grades and getting great remarks. I am pleased.
Brittany and Stacy went out hunting yesterday with Jason! Brittany had a great time... even though she didnt get anything. She did see a doe... and wanted it be a buck ever so badly... but it wasnt. At least she saw something!!
She is pretty die hard!! They left before 5 am... and didnt get home to close to 5pm. When I talked to her at lunch, she had no intentions of giving up any time soon.
I think she was more into it than Stacy!! He got cold... then took a nap... then dropped his gun... and broke his backpack! Yes, my husband curled up, on the ground, and used a log as a pillow!!! WTH?!?!
Anyway... Brittany is ready and counting down the days to going out on Saturday!! All ready for having 3 generations out together... Pappy will be joining them!
So I FINALLY started to use my CriCut!!! I LOVE IT!!! Worth every penny... even more so since I got it for $120 OFF!!!! It is all I ever hoped and dreamed!! I am starting on some Christmas crafts!! :-)
I have a few more things to get put away from Thanksgiving... and Fall. Then I guess we will decide just how much we will be decorating... since we wont be home the entire week of Christmas.
AND we need to figure what kind of arrangements we will make for the dogs that week. I am thinking we will suck it up and board Nanuq and Sakari. Not sure yet.
The closer we get to Christmas week... the more my grandfather is getting on my damn nerves about it!! UGH!
That is all I have for now. I gotta get on the kid's school work... they are already pulling out snow pants and coats!!! They are on a mission to get out and play! :-)
The only thing missing is my Amaruq watching it fall... and then finding all the spunk he has left in his body and going out to run in it!! :-( I miss him bunches.
No school delay for Courtney... I am FOREVER thankful for that one. She was working on my last nerve, since she had off for well over a week!!!
And YES... since Courtney REFUSED to find out when her first day back at school was... way early last week when I asked her to. I let her butt get up, get dressed and go out to wait for the bus YESTERDAY!!! Knowing full well she didnt have school!!!! Seems mean... I know. BUT... it was a lesson in being responsible for her OWN life and schedule! It did end up turning into an argument... and she wanted ME to be blamed for HER lack of being responsible! NOT!!!
We are still having the "GET A JOB" battle too!!! Yea, that was another messy argument last night.
Stacy got himself yet ANOTHER speeding ticket on Sunday. 2nd one in a month!!! AND, he tried to hide it from me!!!! WTF!?!? I am pretty pissed off about it. I am tired of wasting money to pay them. It isnt a hard concept... DRIVE THE SPEED LIMIT!!! I told him... one more... and he is gonna need to find a new damn home! I REFUSE to add "Stacy's speeding tickets" to our monthly budget... it is just bullshit now! To think... he had the balls to bitch at Josh about speeding!!! Hmmmm... maybe Josh learned it by watching Stacy! I mean really... do as I say, not as I do... just doesnt cut it in the world of parenting. GRRRR!
My knee is giving me one hell of a time. In addition to the steroid injection I got just over a week ago... I am now on oral steroids. I am not real happy about it. They tend to make me crabby... and I really dont need any other reason to be crabby. I mean really... look at my life!
My class is going GREAT! I LOVE IT!!! I am chomping at the bit to enroll in the other school option. But, I am really trying to hold off. (Gotta keep up with Stacy's fines first... the asshole).
Anyway... still making excellent grades and getting great remarks. I am pleased.
Brittany and Stacy went out hunting yesterday with Jason! Brittany had a great time... even though she didnt get anything. She did see a doe... and wanted it be a buck ever so badly... but it wasnt. At least she saw something!!
She is pretty die hard!! They left before 5 am... and didnt get home to close to 5pm. When I talked to her at lunch, she had no intentions of giving up any time soon.
I think she was more into it than Stacy!! He got cold... then took a nap... then dropped his gun... and broke his backpack! Yes, my husband curled up, on the ground, and used a log as a pillow!!! WTH?!?!
Anyway... Brittany is ready and counting down the days to going out on Saturday!! All ready for having 3 generations out together... Pappy will be joining them!
So I FINALLY started to use my CriCut!!! I LOVE IT!!! Worth every penny... even more so since I got it for $120 OFF!!!! It is all I ever hoped and dreamed!! I am starting on some Christmas crafts!! :-)
I have a few more things to get put away from Thanksgiving... and Fall. Then I guess we will decide just how much we will be decorating... since we wont be home the entire week of Christmas.
AND we need to figure what kind of arrangements we will make for the dogs that week. I am thinking we will suck it up and board Nanuq and Sakari. Not sure yet.
The closer we get to Christmas week... the more my grandfather is getting on my damn nerves about it!! UGH!
That is all I have for now. I gotta get on the kid's school work... they are already pulling out snow pants and coats!!! They are on a mission to get out and play! :-)
Saturday, November 24, 2012
Thanksgiving
That BIG day was here and is now gone!!
Here are some of our memories---
Josh came up and spent the WHOLE day with us!! First Thanksgiving in 3 yrs that he hasnt had to work!! It was nice having him here... I miss him. We need to include him and Ashley in on our day trips.
Josh's girlfriend (Ashley) needs to eat more!
My grandparents were clueless that Josh has a girlfriend!
When having family all together in one place... things tend to be a bit loud! Especially if you have an Aunt Vickie!! LOL
Carrey said things I was thinking for hours in the after noon.... Hmmmm.... am I developing a filter?!?!?
Jason makes PRICELESS facial expressions when overhearing "strange" Thanksgiving Day conversations. Still wish I would have had a camera for that one!!
Which brings me to... NO conversation is off limits in our house!! LOL!
Which brings me to... we WILL ask "those" questions... I am glad Ashley was not offended!
Black light shows sun damage... and no one was pleased with that fact.
I am the "cool Auntie"... I let Lexi "buy apps" on the Kindle! She was tickled and I LOVE that giggle. Little did she know she was "buying" FREE apps! ;-)
Lexi LOVES Nathan and Brittany. And painting, and stickers, and hanging creations on the fridge!
I miss having a toddler running around and all of those toddler activities!! I need to start borrowing Lexi!! ;-)
EVERYONE has "those" memories of the Hang glider Spot... LOL... Not everyone has them of behind walmart. LMBO!
A 20lb turkey was NOT too big for our dinner.
People did notice that I didnt put as much time and effort into my Thanksgiving Day treats. Damn screwed up knee. I feel bad that I didnt get to be super creative this year. :-(
Brittany's dream come true of the pediatrician's recommendations of massage therapy is coming true... thanks to her "cool aunt"!! ;-)
I LOVE Tennessee Tea!! It makes all of the days stress disappear...and even some of my knee pain! It also makes Jason have an instant, momentary drunk feeling! LOL!
There will be TONS of hunting talk on Thanksgiving Day... and Brittany loved it!
After eating 20lbs of turkey... no one wanted to help with the roof project. LOL
I know I am missing a bunch of things... One thing is for sure... It was an awesome day!! I am so glad we are able to put together our annual Thanksgiving Feast... and that everyone is open to joining us!!
We are blessed... that is 100% for certain!!
Here are some of our memories---
Josh came up and spent the WHOLE day with us!! First Thanksgiving in 3 yrs that he hasnt had to work!! It was nice having him here... I miss him. We need to include him and Ashley in on our day trips.
Josh's girlfriend (Ashley) needs to eat more!
My grandparents were clueless that Josh has a girlfriend!
When having family all together in one place... things tend to be a bit loud! Especially if you have an Aunt Vickie!! LOL
Carrey said things I was thinking for hours in the after noon.... Hmmmm.... am I developing a filter?!?!?
Jason makes PRICELESS facial expressions when overhearing "strange" Thanksgiving Day conversations. Still wish I would have had a camera for that one!!
Which brings me to... NO conversation is off limits in our house!! LOL!
Which brings me to... we WILL ask "those" questions... I am glad Ashley was not offended!
Black light shows sun damage... and no one was pleased with that fact.
I am the "cool Auntie"... I let Lexi "buy apps" on the Kindle! She was tickled and I LOVE that giggle. Little did she know she was "buying" FREE apps! ;-)
Lexi LOVES Nathan and Brittany. And painting, and stickers, and hanging creations on the fridge!
I miss having a toddler running around and all of those toddler activities!! I need to start borrowing Lexi!! ;-)
EVERYONE has "those" memories of the Hang glider Spot... LOL... Not everyone has them of behind walmart. LMBO!
A 20lb turkey was NOT too big for our dinner.
People did notice that I didnt put as much time and effort into my Thanksgiving Day treats. Damn screwed up knee. I feel bad that I didnt get to be super creative this year. :-(
Brittany's dream come true of the pediatrician's recommendations of massage therapy is coming true... thanks to her "cool aunt"!! ;-)
I LOVE Tennessee Tea!! It makes all of the days stress disappear...and even some of my knee pain! It also makes Jason have an instant, momentary drunk feeling! LOL!
There will be TONS of hunting talk on Thanksgiving Day... and Brittany loved it!
After eating 20lbs of turkey... no one wanted to help with the roof project. LOL
I know I am missing a bunch of things... One thing is for sure... It was an awesome day!! I am so glad we are able to put together our annual Thanksgiving Feast... and that everyone is open to joining us!!
We are blessed... that is 100% for certain!!
Monday, November 19, 2012
Progressing...
I have already made a ton of progress this morning!! :-D
My appt is set for THIS Wednesday with my knee/hip Dr. I called JUST as he had a cancellation call it! GO ME!!
Pain Management Drs cant see me until Dec 11th... but that is ok.
AND... tomorrow I go in to JRF for a tour and to get started! They have toning tables... which is PERFECT for me with my injuries! :-) I feel the cost is WELL worth it. Way better than the "Y" costs! AND better than the "gym drama" at Armstrong...or whatever it is called now.
I also have a Chiropractor appt tomorrow afternoon... and so does Stacy.
This is all working out rather well!!
I took my 2nd test and turned in my 2nd assignment for my class. Another set of 100%'s!!
I am still in pain... oh wait... "DISCOMFORT"... and I am really trying not to let it get to me. I think today I will shift gears to Thanksgiving preparing! I have a few "projects" I would like to get done today... since the rest of my week seems to be filling up real quick!!
I crocheted 2 more hats yesterday. Not sure what the hell I am going to do with them all. LOL! Maybe I will try to tweak the pattern a little more... get a different look from it. Who knows. But, I can do them with my eyes closed now... so I have to change up something...LOL!
Puppies are now officially ready for new homes!!! They turned 8wks old on Saturday! They started chomping away on hard food yesterday... and seem to enjoy making the crunching sounds! LOL!! They have a vet appt on the 28th for their first shots and to get a good once over!
They are so adorable!!!
Ok... there was my quick update... gotta get on with the next things on my list today!
My appt is set for THIS Wednesday with my knee/hip Dr. I called JUST as he had a cancellation call it! GO ME!!
Pain Management Drs cant see me until Dec 11th... but that is ok.
AND... tomorrow I go in to JRF for a tour and to get started! They have toning tables... which is PERFECT for me with my injuries! :-) I feel the cost is WELL worth it. Way better than the "Y" costs! AND better than the "gym drama" at Armstrong...or whatever it is called now.
I also have a Chiropractor appt tomorrow afternoon... and so does Stacy.
This is all working out rather well!!
I took my 2nd test and turned in my 2nd assignment for my class. Another set of 100%'s!!
I am still in pain... oh wait... "DISCOMFORT"... and I am really trying not to let it get to me. I think today I will shift gears to Thanksgiving preparing! I have a few "projects" I would like to get done today... since the rest of my week seems to be filling up real quick!!
I crocheted 2 more hats yesterday. Not sure what the hell I am going to do with them all. LOL! Maybe I will try to tweak the pattern a little more... get a different look from it. Who knows. But, I can do them with my eyes closed now... so I have to change up something...LOL!
Puppies are now officially ready for new homes!!! They turned 8wks old on Saturday! They started chomping away on hard food yesterday... and seem to enjoy making the crunching sounds! LOL!! They have a vet appt on the 28th for their first shots and to get a good once over!
They are so adorable!!!
Ok... there was my quick update... gotta get on with the next things on my list today!
Saturday, November 17, 2012
Tough times
Things have taken a crazy twist around here, to say the least.
Courtney has taken some steps back... in some areas. BUT, taking some HUGE steps forward in others! There is just never any rhyme or reason to her sometimes.
Last week I started 1 single class... online. I LOVE IT!!! I almost feel like it really isnt challenging enough for more... and I think next time around, I may over load my plate. Typical thing I do. But right now I am just left feeling like I want MORE. I am getting GREAT feedback from my teacher and she suggests that after this class I step it up and try something that would be more fit to my skill level in the area.... which would mean a different school. I am pretty stoked!!! I was really beginning to wonder if I had it in me... but hearing her remarks on the work I have turned in so far... she said I have the talent and the skills... just need to fine tune a few areas, which I knew were an issue with me. She thinks she can do that with this class... and pass me off to a more difficult program! Time will tell!!!
I guess I better get creative with our budgeting now... so if/when the time does come, it isnt something I have to turn down because of lack of funding!
So, another twist this week... I f**ked up my knee... big time!!
I have been having an ongoing issues with my hip... well, because of that, and my deep need to be out in the woods... I now have a major knee issue. I had a tear repair about 6+ yrs ago... which I was told may or may not hold up for 2-3 yrs (if I was lucky) because of the severity of the tear. WELL... of course... they are thinking I re-tore the original tear... which was an ugly one... so that means it probably even worse!
BUT... the kicker with our health care system... they cant just do an MRI on my knee. Even though I have a history of an extreme injury. NOPE... the insurance wants to see them "try" to just band aid the situation BEFORE they actually find out what they are trying to band aid. Which REALLY pisses me off. Soooo... I got a nice steroid injection in my knee... which has made the whole situation worse!!! I am in freakin pain, no one will even look at my hip... which was the start of this whole mess... and maybe next week I will be able to schedule an MRI for my knee.
My plan... Monday I am calling the original Dr who did the repair... and getting an appt to see him. I liked him. He did the surgery even tho there was a huge chance he wouldnt be able to repair the tear in the first place. AND, he didnt make me wait around in pain forever! He told me back then I had some issues with my hip that would need to be addressed in the future. IT IS THE FUTURE!!! So lets figure this shit out!!! Hiking is all I have left. I have had to give up EVERYTHING else. I am not very happy about any of this.
This is the shit you have to deal with when you spend so much of your life abusing your body and pushing it to the limits. In all honesty tho... I wouldnt give up a second of it. I lived life... I had a blast... and I can honestly say I have done more things than most ppl! I just wish I wasnt stuck on my ass now. BLAH!!
I am getting a lot of crocheting done! I am fine tuning my hat pattern... and I am lovin it. I got 2 hats completely finished today. 2 are waiting for some finishing touches. 1 is being crocheted now.
I have decided to start crafting my ass off... and storing my creations for next years craft fairs! I am hoping before Stacy calls it a day today... he will cut some wood for me... I have some things in my mind I want to create for our Thanksgiving Feast! And some to put away.
I already have this years Christmas ornaments decided on. Once I make it through Thanksgiving...I will be starting on them!! :-)
Ah, yes... Thanksgiving.... We are expecting our biggest crowd yet... and I will be preparing with a knee injury! Good thing I am always up for a challenge!!!
This Wednesday we will be meeting to go over all of the paper work for getting Courtney into college... I am almost afraid of what our part of the college bill will be! I am just hoping that we can have Courtney completely through college and a degree in her hand BEFORE it is Brittany's turn to start!!!
Nathan made HONOR ROLL this marking period!!! I am super proud of him!!! He is doing a GREAT job at working on his stuff ... on his own! He is able to keep his grades up... and knows he can come to me whenever he needs to. I think, now that I am in a class... it is only fair that I have to keep my grades up and posted on the fridge like he does! :-)
It is so weird that after I get through the day of school with Nathan and Britt... I have my own school work to do!
I am so happy with my decision.
That is all I can sit here and type at the moment. My knee is killing me and needs propped back up with some ice. THIS SUCKS!!!!
I feel bad... Stacy and his dad are up working on the roof again today... and I wasnt able to make them anything to eat today. Stacy had to throw some burgers on... and make one for me!! Boy, that is a huge switch!!!
I did manage to hobble along, with my crutches, at the grocery store last nite to pick up the main things we will need for our Thanksgiving Feast! It was rough... but I managed, with Stacy and Brittany's help! We did miss a few things... but I just couldnt keep going anymore... we will have to pick up some things early next week.
Hmmmm.... I think I need an icee tonite! LOL! :-D
Courtney has taken some steps back... in some areas. BUT, taking some HUGE steps forward in others! There is just never any rhyme or reason to her sometimes.
Last week I started 1 single class... online. I LOVE IT!!! I almost feel like it really isnt challenging enough for more... and I think next time around, I may over load my plate. Typical thing I do. But right now I am just left feeling like I want MORE. I am getting GREAT feedback from my teacher and she suggests that after this class I step it up and try something that would be more fit to my skill level in the area.... which would mean a different school. I am pretty stoked!!! I was really beginning to wonder if I had it in me... but hearing her remarks on the work I have turned in so far... she said I have the talent and the skills... just need to fine tune a few areas, which I knew were an issue with me. She thinks she can do that with this class... and pass me off to a more difficult program! Time will tell!!!
I guess I better get creative with our budgeting now... so if/when the time does come, it isnt something I have to turn down because of lack of funding!
So, another twist this week... I f**ked up my knee... big time!!
I have been having an ongoing issues with my hip... well, because of that, and my deep need to be out in the woods... I now have a major knee issue. I had a tear repair about 6+ yrs ago... which I was told may or may not hold up for 2-3 yrs (if I was lucky) because of the severity of the tear. WELL... of course... they are thinking I re-tore the original tear... which was an ugly one... so that means it probably even worse!
BUT... the kicker with our health care system... they cant just do an MRI on my knee. Even though I have a history of an extreme injury. NOPE... the insurance wants to see them "try" to just band aid the situation BEFORE they actually find out what they are trying to band aid. Which REALLY pisses me off. Soooo... I got a nice steroid injection in my knee... which has made the whole situation worse!!! I am in freakin pain, no one will even look at my hip... which was the start of this whole mess... and maybe next week I will be able to schedule an MRI for my knee.
My plan... Monday I am calling the original Dr who did the repair... and getting an appt to see him. I liked him. He did the surgery even tho there was a huge chance he wouldnt be able to repair the tear in the first place. AND, he didnt make me wait around in pain forever! He told me back then I had some issues with my hip that would need to be addressed in the future. IT IS THE FUTURE!!! So lets figure this shit out!!! Hiking is all I have left. I have had to give up EVERYTHING else. I am not very happy about any of this.
This is the shit you have to deal with when you spend so much of your life abusing your body and pushing it to the limits. In all honesty tho... I wouldnt give up a second of it. I lived life... I had a blast... and I can honestly say I have done more things than most ppl! I just wish I wasnt stuck on my ass now. BLAH!!
I am getting a lot of crocheting done! I am fine tuning my hat pattern... and I am lovin it. I got 2 hats completely finished today. 2 are waiting for some finishing touches. 1 is being crocheted now.
I have decided to start crafting my ass off... and storing my creations for next years craft fairs! I am hoping before Stacy calls it a day today... he will cut some wood for me... I have some things in my mind I want to create for our Thanksgiving Feast! And some to put away.
I already have this years Christmas ornaments decided on. Once I make it through Thanksgiving...I will be starting on them!! :-)
Ah, yes... Thanksgiving.... We are expecting our biggest crowd yet... and I will be preparing with a knee injury! Good thing I am always up for a challenge!!!
This Wednesday we will be meeting to go over all of the paper work for getting Courtney into college... I am almost afraid of what our part of the college bill will be! I am just hoping that we can have Courtney completely through college and a degree in her hand BEFORE it is Brittany's turn to start!!!
Nathan made HONOR ROLL this marking period!!! I am super proud of him!!! He is doing a GREAT job at working on his stuff ... on his own! He is able to keep his grades up... and knows he can come to me whenever he needs to. I think, now that I am in a class... it is only fair that I have to keep my grades up and posted on the fridge like he does! :-)
It is so weird that after I get through the day of school with Nathan and Britt... I have my own school work to do!
I am so happy with my decision.
That is all I can sit here and type at the moment. My knee is killing me and needs propped back up with some ice. THIS SUCKS!!!!
I feel bad... Stacy and his dad are up working on the roof again today... and I wasnt able to make them anything to eat today. Stacy had to throw some burgers on... and make one for me!! Boy, that is a huge switch!!!
I did manage to hobble along, with my crutches, at the grocery store last nite to pick up the main things we will need for our Thanksgiving Feast! It was rough... but I managed, with Stacy and Brittany's help! We did miss a few things... but I just couldnt keep going anymore... we will have to pick up some things early next week.
Hmmmm.... I think I need an icee tonite! LOL! :-D
Tuesday, November 13, 2012
Stress...with a side of bitter
I know I sometimes sound like a broken damn record. BUT... no one could ever understand the shit we go through on this journey with Courtney!!!!!!!
I am about sick and tired of fight this fight. I am sick of the anxiety attacks and the chest pains. I am tired of pushing her... just to have her push back 10X harder.
I just dont know what to do anymore.
I thought we were on the same page. She said she was motivated to do what was needed to meet her goals.
Well, talk is cheap.
Yesterday her CM took her out to apply for jobs. Courtney refused. EVERYWHERE they went!!! She has no desire to better her life. Or get off her ass!
I also found out yesterday that we will be responsible for paying a percentage of her college. Which wouldnt be an issue... IF I knew she would use the education to get a job when she was done with school.
I have been wanting to go back to college for awhile now. I havent been able to... because it just isnt in our budget. I am taking 1 online class at a time.
It will REALLY piss me off if we put out all of that money for Courtney to go to school... just to have her waste it!!!
Yes, this is where the side of bitter comes in!!!!!! I am ALWAYS putting aside my own personal likes and hobbies and dreams... for my kids. Which is what a parent is suppose to do. I just wish one of them would appreciate it!!!
This battle with Courtney is getting old. It is really wearing me down and I just dont know how much more I can take.
I am tired of the anxiety attacks. I am tired of the chest pains. I am tired of worrying if a major stroke is just around the corner for me!
When is enough .... enough... ?!?!?!?!?!?
When do I just stop the insanity. Because really... what we are doing with Courtney and the games she plays...is just INSANITY!!!!
It just isnt fair to my other 2 kids at home. I have no patience for them, or whatever they are dealing with. I get up in the morning pissy.... I go to bed even more pissy.
I want off this damn roller coaster!
I am about sick and tired of fight this fight. I am sick of the anxiety attacks and the chest pains. I am tired of pushing her... just to have her push back 10X harder.
I just dont know what to do anymore.
I thought we were on the same page. She said she was motivated to do what was needed to meet her goals.
Well, talk is cheap.
Yesterday her CM took her out to apply for jobs. Courtney refused. EVERYWHERE they went!!! She has no desire to better her life. Or get off her ass!
I also found out yesterday that we will be responsible for paying a percentage of her college. Which wouldnt be an issue... IF I knew she would use the education to get a job when she was done with school.
I have been wanting to go back to college for awhile now. I havent been able to... because it just isnt in our budget. I am taking 1 online class at a time.
It will REALLY piss me off if we put out all of that money for Courtney to go to school... just to have her waste it!!!
Yes, this is where the side of bitter comes in!!!!!! I am ALWAYS putting aside my own personal likes and hobbies and dreams... for my kids. Which is what a parent is suppose to do. I just wish one of them would appreciate it!!!
This battle with Courtney is getting old. It is really wearing me down and I just dont know how much more I can take.
I am tired of the anxiety attacks. I am tired of the chest pains. I am tired of worrying if a major stroke is just around the corner for me!
When is enough .... enough... ?!?!?!?!?!?
When do I just stop the insanity. Because really... what we are doing with Courtney and the games she plays...is just INSANITY!!!!
It just isnt fair to my other 2 kids at home. I have no patience for them, or whatever they are dealing with. I get up in the morning pissy.... I go to bed even more pissy.
I want off this damn roller coaster!
Sunday, November 11, 2012
Just things...
I have found that finding time to blog has been a bit of a challenge lately. I seem to always add more "stuff" to my already full plate! When will I learn?
The puppies are getting big... well, as "big" as little dogs get...LOL! Yesterday they turned 7 weeks old. We are still fighting their lack of interest in weaning... but they are getting better at eating. We have had to keep Ellie away from them the past few days... she just wants to growl and nip at them. I think she has had enough of being a mommy. Gunner, on the other hand, thinks they are HIS puppies... and he has taken to "mommy" role... which is hilarious!!! He is actually doing a better job than Ellie did...lol. What is even more surprising... they LOVE him too!
Tomorrow I will call and make their first vet appt!!
We do have some ppl interested in taking them. Not sure how the kids are going to feel about saying "goodbye" to the cute little creatures tho!! I guess a "Family Meeting" will have to take place.
Progress is still being made on our roof. I am afraid that after next weekend, whatever isnt finished will have to wait until Spring. Lord only knows what bad things can happen to that metal over the winter. But I am sure we will find out. Grrr.
My online classes start this week. I am pretty excited!! I LOVE the whole idea around online learning... because there is NO way I could go to a college campus and still keep up with EVERYTHING else!!!
I am starting off slow... to see how well I can manage it. But if all goes well... the possibilities are endless!!! :-D LOL
Today looks like it is going to be a beautiful day!! Maybe Gunner and I... and maybe Britt too... will have to go take a nice long walk! We got a nice hike in Friday afternoon! I LOVE when the sun shines... and I am able to be outside. My hip has been bothering me... I am afraid I will have to suck it up and head back to the Dr about it. BLAH!
Our THANKSGIVING FEAST is right around the corner!!!
This week I will get serious on putting together our menu and getting things all sorted out. I am thinking we will have the most ppl this year, than any previous year!! I cant wait! :-D
I am thinking about putting together some sort of raffle or something too... Not sure, just an idea I have been tossing around. Only time will tell what I pull out of my hat. LOL
Speaking of hats... I made my first attempt at crocheting a brimmed hat!! It turned out pretty cute. I just have some "finishing touches" I want to add yet!! I also know what I want to do different with them next one I put together... which will probably be this week.
Stacy and the kid are on their 2nd big puzzle. The first one they started during Super Storm Sandy... and finished it last week. The table sat empty for only a day before the next one came out! LOL!! I guess I will have to find some new puzzles on line. At this rate they will be through our "stash" in no time.
I guess that is all I have for now.
I have a bunch of things in the works... just dont want to share any of them... yet. ;-) More changes are coming!!!
The puppies are getting big... well, as "big" as little dogs get...LOL! Yesterday they turned 7 weeks old. We are still fighting their lack of interest in weaning... but they are getting better at eating. We have had to keep Ellie away from them the past few days... she just wants to growl and nip at them. I think she has had enough of being a mommy. Gunner, on the other hand, thinks they are HIS puppies... and he has taken to "mommy" role... which is hilarious!!! He is actually doing a better job than Ellie did...lol. What is even more surprising... they LOVE him too!
Tomorrow I will call and make their first vet appt!!
We do have some ppl interested in taking them. Not sure how the kids are going to feel about saying "goodbye" to the cute little creatures tho!! I guess a "Family Meeting" will have to take place.
Progress is still being made on our roof. I am afraid that after next weekend, whatever isnt finished will have to wait until Spring. Lord only knows what bad things can happen to that metal over the winter. But I am sure we will find out. Grrr.
My online classes start this week. I am pretty excited!! I LOVE the whole idea around online learning... because there is NO way I could go to a college campus and still keep up with EVERYTHING else!!!
I am starting off slow... to see how well I can manage it. But if all goes well... the possibilities are endless!!! :-D LOL
Today looks like it is going to be a beautiful day!! Maybe Gunner and I... and maybe Britt too... will have to go take a nice long walk! We got a nice hike in Friday afternoon! I LOVE when the sun shines... and I am able to be outside. My hip has been bothering me... I am afraid I will have to suck it up and head back to the Dr about it. BLAH!
Our THANKSGIVING FEAST is right around the corner!!!
This week I will get serious on putting together our menu and getting things all sorted out. I am thinking we will have the most ppl this year, than any previous year!! I cant wait! :-D
I am thinking about putting together some sort of raffle or something too... Not sure, just an idea I have been tossing around. Only time will tell what I pull out of my hat. LOL
Speaking of hats... I made my first attempt at crocheting a brimmed hat!! It turned out pretty cute. I just have some "finishing touches" I want to add yet!! I also know what I want to do different with them next one I put together... which will probably be this week.
Stacy and the kid are on their 2nd big puzzle. The first one they started during Super Storm Sandy... and finished it last week. The table sat empty for only a day before the next one came out! LOL!! I guess I will have to find some new puzzles on line. At this rate they will be through our "stash" in no time.
I guess that is all I have for now.
I have a bunch of things in the works... just dont want to share any of them... yet. ;-) More changes are coming!!!
Tuesday, November 6, 2012
End of the 1st Quarter!
Today is the end of our first marking period!! We are tying up any loose ends, making sure everything has been submitted and ready to see some GRADES!!
I am so very proud of Brittany and Nathan!! They have really been working hard and putting in a lot of effort... their grades show it!!
I am holding strong... on day #4 without an icee. This may seem silly to some of you... but it is pretty serious to me. I get very few simple pleasures in life. I dont drink soda... or coffee... I dont smoke... or drink. An Icee provides a little joy on the worst of days.
Well, since my heart has been acting up... I gave them up. Not completely, I will not lie. I use to average 1 a day... I am cutting back to 1 a week. It isnt easy.
I have also gotten more serious about getting 30lbs off. It is killing me. It is contributing to my heart issues. It is making my back worse then it really needs to be.
I have been holding steady at my current weight for about 1 year... give or take 3lbs either way. It is time to step it up a notch and get the scale moving DOWN and staying DOWN!!
I always make sure we buy healthy foods, I make most of what we eat from scratch. I dont buy junk at all. I am not a lazy person by any sense!!! I LOVE to walk and hike... I just need to do it more. With it getting colder and now that it gets darker earlier... that wont be easy!
I am pretty sure I am going to join Just Right Fitness again. I did it a few years back and had great success! I lost 25lbs and was only really going 2 times a week. So, if I ramp it up to 3 times a week... and make sure I get a walk in on my "off" days... I should be feeling and looking better in no time! ;-)
Lets see... what else do we have going on...
Courtney starts driving lessons today! I am so excited for her!!! Stacy had her out last nite driving for a little bit... he said she is doing better!! AND... she is VERY proud of herself!
Rumor has it that there will be an OVR meeting on Thursday, to get her started with the process of continuing her education!! She is actually looking forward to it!! I am so thankful for that!!
It will soon be time to start planning our THANKSGIVING FEAST!! I am pretty excited. I always get excited about it. Even tho it can really stress me out sometimes. LOL!
After that... we will get to planning our WEEK LONG CHRISTMAS/ANNIVERSARY RETREAT TO THE CABIN!!!! :-D Oh yes... an entire week in the woods, in the winter! I LOVE IT!!! I soooooo hope it snows BUCKETS!!!! We will be well prepared... for snow and for fun!! We will have soooo much fun... ALL family time together!!! I am seriously counting down the days! I really hope Josh will be joining us too! That would really complete the season for me! Fireplace, crocheting, one single, crappy radio station, my kids, my hubby, my dogs and my grandparents! :-)
Ok... I better get back to business... Tonite is gymnastics nite too. Tuesdays are always so crazy!!!
I am so very proud of Brittany and Nathan!! They have really been working hard and putting in a lot of effort... their grades show it!!
I am holding strong... on day #4 without an icee. This may seem silly to some of you... but it is pretty serious to me. I get very few simple pleasures in life. I dont drink soda... or coffee... I dont smoke... or drink. An Icee provides a little joy on the worst of days.
Well, since my heart has been acting up... I gave them up. Not completely, I will not lie. I use to average 1 a day... I am cutting back to 1 a week. It isnt easy.
I have also gotten more serious about getting 30lbs off. It is killing me. It is contributing to my heart issues. It is making my back worse then it really needs to be.
I have been holding steady at my current weight for about 1 year... give or take 3lbs either way. It is time to step it up a notch and get the scale moving DOWN and staying DOWN!!
I always make sure we buy healthy foods, I make most of what we eat from scratch. I dont buy junk at all. I am not a lazy person by any sense!!! I LOVE to walk and hike... I just need to do it more. With it getting colder and now that it gets darker earlier... that wont be easy!
I am pretty sure I am going to join Just Right Fitness again. I did it a few years back and had great success! I lost 25lbs and was only really going 2 times a week. So, if I ramp it up to 3 times a week... and make sure I get a walk in on my "off" days... I should be feeling and looking better in no time! ;-)
Lets see... what else do we have going on...
Courtney starts driving lessons today! I am so excited for her!!! Stacy had her out last nite driving for a little bit... he said she is doing better!! AND... she is VERY proud of herself!
Rumor has it that there will be an OVR meeting on Thursday, to get her started with the process of continuing her education!! She is actually looking forward to it!! I am so thankful for that!!
It will soon be time to start planning our THANKSGIVING FEAST!! I am pretty excited. I always get excited about it. Even tho it can really stress me out sometimes. LOL!
After that... we will get to planning our WEEK LONG CHRISTMAS/ANNIVERSARY RETREAT TO THE CABIN!!!! :-D Oh yes... an entire week in the woods, in the winter! I LOVE IT!!! I soooooo hope it snows BUCKETS!!!! We will be well prepared... for snow and for fun!! We will have soooo much fun... ALL family time together!!! I am seriously counting down the days! I really hope Josh will be joining us too! That would really complete the season for me! Fireplace, crocheting, one single, crappy radio station, my kids, my hubby, my dogs and my grandparents! :-)
Ok... I better get back to business... Tonite is gymnastics nite too. Tuesdays are always so crazy!!!
Saturday, November 3, 2012
Current "Projects"
I am realizing I need to sit my ass down at my craft table and FINISH some projects!!
Today I got a BUNCH of new ideas... while at the Craft Fair at Line Mountain!!
OK... on my Craft Table, to be finished:
~Leaf Votive candle holders
~Picture frames for "nature" photographs
I have a few things sitting to be started... but may have to wait until the Holiday crafts are done. I have some ideas for this years Christmas ornament AND some home made gifts.
It has been pretty hard for me lately... to keep track of things and stay focused. Even speaking has become an issue...cant get the words out of my head and through my mouth! GRRRR!!! Gotta get in with my neurologist and make sure it is still post mini stroke stuff and there isnt something else going on.
It could be just stress and having so many ideas and other things floating around... which is what I am really hoping!
I went and picked up some new photography equipment today! I got a GREAT deal... and it is GREAT equipment!! I cant wait to put it to use!
I think I will try to make some time tomorrow to get out and play with different settings on my camera. I gotta get Gunner out working some too.
Truck got inspected yesterday... FINALLY.
Visited with my in laws last nite... had a blast with our niece... OMGoodness, she cracks me up.
Spent a few hours at the craft fair this morning with my girls, MIL, & SIL. Had fun... So did my girls!!
That about sums up the past few days.
Today I got a BUNCH of new ideas... while at the Craft Fair at Line Mountain!!
OK... on my Craft Table, to be finished:
~Leaf Votive candle holders
~Picture frames for "nature" photographs
I have a few things sitting to be started... but may have to wait until the Holiday crafts are done. I have some ideas for this years Christmas ornament AND some home made gifts.
It has been pretty hard for me lately... to keep track of things and stay focused. Even speaking has become an issue...cant get the words out of my head and through my mouth! GRRRR!!! Gotta get in with my neurologist and make sure it is still post mini stroke stuff and there isnt something else going on.
It could be just stress and having so many ideas and other things floating around... which is what I am really hoping!
I went and picked up some new photography equipment today! I got a GREAT deal... and it is GREAT equipment!! I cant wait to put it to use!
I think I will try to make some time tomorrow to get out and play with different settings on my camera. I gotta get Gunner out working some too.
Truck got inspected yesterday... FINALLY.
Visited with my in laws last nite... had a blast with our niece... OMGoodness, she cracks me up.
Spent a few hours at the craft fair this morning with my girls, MIL, & SIL. Had fun... So did my girls!!
That about sums up the past few days.
Wednesday, October 31, 2012
Taking a minute to jot down some thoughts
I am always looking for ways to better our lives. I am also always wondering if I make the "right" decisions. I try to do good things... and help others.
Sometimes I get to a point where I just wonder WHY?!?!
I am really seeing things from both sides of the coin lately.
I have been going out of my way to help others lately. I am putting my own needs and sanity aside to do all I can for ppl. I have been really stretched pretty thin. I am not looking for anything in return... and I dont expect anything in return. But it would be nice to know that these ppl at least care about me and my family. A simple "hey, how are ya doing?" goes a long way. Especially when it is OBVIOUS that things have been a bit stressful for us lately.
Now, I am married to a man who doesnt really like to go and ask how other's are doing. His thinking is... if someone needs something, they know they can call him. Really... do they??? Maybe ppl just feel like I do with the ppl I am dealing with... like he doesnt care. Hmmmmm....
It is interesting to get to chit chat about these things with Stacy. He never really thought about it, until I expressed my feelings of not getting at least a "hey, how are ya... been thinking about you"
While we were out yesterday (we went to take pics of things in storage that need to just be sold now)... I decided to mention making some "rounds" and checking in on ppl. Of course I got the ... "I am sure they are all fine, or we would have heard something by now." I pushed through that... reminding him about how I feel about certain things (he isnt real sharp when it comes to things like this...lol)... so we made some stops, did some quick visits. I think once he saw the smile on his grandmother's face and her telling him she was glad he stopped and was happy to see him... IT CLICKED!!! ;-)
On the way out we fixed her rain spouting and I made mention of checking in on his mom. Which we did... and he got the same smile!
My point... sometimes it is just the little things that mean so much!
As for me....
I am pretty much done doing the "big" things... for ppl who dont even give me the time of day... well, until they need or want something.
I am sure I can find ppl that will appreciate what I have to offer and at least remember to say "hey" during some tough times.
Sometimes I get to a point where I just wonder WHY?!?!
I am really seeing things from both sides of the coin lately.
I have been going out of my way to help others lately. I am putting my own needs and sanity aside to do all I can for ppl. I have been really stretched pretty thin. I am not looking for anything in return... and I dont expect anything in return. But it would be nice to know that these ppl at least care about me and my family. A simple "hey, how are ya doing?" goes a long way. Especially when it is OBVIOUS that things have been a bit stressful for us lately.
Now, I am married to a man who doesnt really like to go and ask how other's are doing. His thinking is... if someone needs something, they know they can call him. Really... do they??? Maybe ppl just feel like I do with the ppl I am dealing with... like he doesnt care. Hmmmmm....
It is interesting to get to chit chat about these things with Stacy. He never really thought about it, until I expressed my feelings of not getting at least a "hey, how are ya... been thinking about you"
While we were out yesterday (we went to take pics of things in storage that need to just be sold now)... I decided to mention making some "rounds" and checking in on ppl. Of course I got the ... "I am sure they are all fine, or we would have heard something by now." I pushed through that... reminding him about how I feel about certain things (he isnt real sharp when it comes to things like this...lol)... so we made some stops, did some quick visits. I think once he saw the smile on his grandmother's face and her telling him she was glad he stopped and was happy to see him... IT CLICKED!!! ;-)
On the way out we fixed her rain spouting and I made mention of checking in on his mom. Which we did... and he got the same smile!
My point... sometimes it is just the little things that mean so much!
As for me....
I am pretty much done doing the "big" things... for ppl who dont even give me the time of day... well, until they need or want something.
I am sure I can find ppl that will appreciate what I have to offer and at least remember to say "hey" during some tough times.
Monday, October 29, 2012
Our week...last week
Well, last week was busy... eventful... stressful... and some of it was just bullshit!
We went and toured HGA... Stacy and I thought it was FANTASTIC! Of course we had 2 days of negativity and crap from Courtney. But, at this point she is willing to go. We are also trying to get her in to start in the April session. We had originally were hoping for her to start in January... but after I called and spoke to admissions... there is just no way we can get everything in order by the cut off date. So... our new target date is April.
It was a stressful few days dealing with that stuff. Courtney was making EVERYONE miserable!!
Once we got that all sorted out we were hit with a surprise visit from Dog Law AND a Humane Society officer... WITH 3 (THREE) trucks full of crates to take animals out of our house!!!! Oh yes... some MORON called and reported us for living in unsanitary conditions... having chickens, ducks and OTHER LIVESTOCK living in our house WITH us!!!!!!!! For goodness sake.
Both gentlemen were in shock to walk into our clean home and see I have ALL of our vet paperwork and other dog paperwork in order!! They seriously said they were told and were expecting to see a house FULL of animals and grossness, according to what they were told on the phone by the person (IDIOT) that reported us!!
Just another case of someone being way too occupied with our lives and causing us issues! People need better hobbies!! It turned out to be a nice visit with these guys. But really not something I had the time for... we were already a bit behind in school work... and I HATE feeling behind in school work!
Friday night was another training session for Gunner. Stacy went along and worked Gunner... good thing, I was still fuming about the days "surprise"!!
Training went really well. Gunner is getting use to working with Tim and Carol... and he was very accepting to hugs from Tim. It is a really nice feeling now... not being so worried about what Gunner will do, every time I take him out in public. Now to figure out what direction we want to take Gunner's training in. I really want to do "something" with him... that was the whole point of getting him!
Saturday Nathan turned 11!! Holy Cow... time sure is flying by quick!!! My baby is 11 :-(
Stacy and Brittany went hunting with my grandfather in the morning. We picked up our beef later in the morning. The kids had their art lessons in the after noon... THEN, after all of that... Nathan's BDay celebration began!!
We went to Cracker Barrel for dinner... Grammy and Pappy joined us. It was Pappy's BDay too!!
After our yummy meal... we took on a corn maze at night... with flashlights!!! NOT EASY!!!! But way fun!!! I really laughed way too much. OMGoodness!!!! I think it was even frustrating Pappy! But we had soooo much fun.
Once we found our way out of the BIG part of the maze... we tried the little maze. It was definitely easier... but still a challenge. The night ended with some peddle cart racing and playing on the farm/playground equipment!
Yesterday we got serious about the pending storm. We had one gas can that needed filled... and I wanted to have my car tank filled too. The truck got moved away from the woods... no falling tree will get my truck!! Stacy went up and checked out the trees around the garage. There was one we were worried about falling... so he made sure if it does come down... it wont be toward our garage.
We also stopped and picked up a RX we had dropped off last week for Nathan.
We also took in the sights of the frenzy!!! Gas stations were out of gas... no bottled water to be found... ANYWHERE. No flashlights or batteries either. It was just pure craziness!!!
Schools are all canceled today and tomorrow. And here we sit.... waiting. I got some crocheting done. I have a few more little projects I would like to finish up. Then, I have no idea what the hell I will be doing!! LOL!!!
I am a little on edge, since Stacy is at work... and we just arent sure how bad we will really get hit with this storm. But, I know I can handle whatever the weather throws our way.
The dogs are all pacing/patrolling the house. They arent very happy. Nathan is worrying his little heart out. UGH! Waiting is the worst.
Ok... well there is our update.
We went and toured HGA... Stacy and I thought it was FANTASTIC! Of course we had 2 days of negativity and crap from Courtney. But, at this point she is willing to go. We are also trying to get her in to start in the April session. We had originally were hoping for her to start in January... but after I called and spoke to admissions... there is just no way we can get everything in order by the cut off date. So... our new target date is April.
It was a stressful few days dealing with that stuff. Courtney was making EVERYONE miserable!!
Once we got that all sorted out we were hit with a surprise visit from Dog Law AND a Humane Society officer... WITH 3 (THREE) trucks full of crates to take animals out of our house!!!! Oh yes... some MORON called and reported us for living in unsanitary conditions... having chickens, ducks and OTHER LIVESTOCK living in our house WITH us!!!!!!!! For goodness sake.
Both gentlemen were in shock to walk into our clean home and see I have ALL of our vet paperwork and other dog paperwork in order!! They seriously said they were told and were expecting to see a house FULL of animals and grossness, according to what they were told on the phone by the person (IDIOT) that reported us!!
Just another case of someone being way too occupied with our lives and causing us issues! People need better hobbies!! It turned out to be a nice visit with these guys. But really not something I had the time for... we were already a bit behind in school work... and I HATE feeling behind in school work!
Friday night was another training session for Gunner. Stacy went along and worked Gunner... good thing, I was still fuming about the days "surprise"!!
Training went really well. Gunner is getting use to working with Tim and Carol... and he was very accepting to hugs from Tim. It is a really nice feeling now... not being so worried about what Gunner will do, every time I take him out in public. Now to figure out what direction we want to take Gunner's training in. I really want to do "something" with him... that was the whole point of getting him!
Saturday Nathan turned 11!! Holy Cow... time sure is flying by quick!!! My baby is 11 :-(
Stacy and Brittany went hunting with my grandfather in the morning. We picked up our beef later in the morning. The kids had their art lessons in the after noon... THEN, after all of that... Nathan's BDay celebration began!!
We went to Cracker Barrel for dinner... Grammy and Pappy joined us. It was Pappy's BDay too!!
After our yummy meal... we took on a corn maze at night... with flashlights!!! NOT EASY!!!! But way fun!!! I really laughed way too much. OMGoodness!!!! I think it was even frustrating Pappy! But we had soooo much fun.
Once we found our way out of the BIG part of the maze... we tried the little maze. It was definitely easier... but still a challenge. The night ended with some peddle cart racing and playing on the farm/playground equipment!
Yesterday we got serious about the pending storm. We had one gas can that needed filled... and I wanted to have my car tank filled too. The truck got moved away from the woods... no falling tree will get my truck!! Stacy went up and checked out the trees around the garage. There was one we were worried about falling... so he made sure if it does come down... it wont be toward our garage.
We also stopped and picked up a RX we had dropped off last week for Nathan.
We also took in the sights of the frenzy!!! Gas stations were out of gas... no bottled water to be found... ANYWHERE. No flashlights or batteries either. It was just pure craziness!!!
Schools are all canceled today and tomorrow. And here we sit.... waiting. I got some crocheting done. I have a few more little projects I would like to finish up. Then, I have no idea what the hell I will be doing!! LOL!!!
I am a little on edge, since Stacy is at work... and we just arent sure how bad we will really get hit with this storm. But, I know I can handle whatever the weather throws our way.
The dogs are all pacing/patrolling the house. They arent very happy. Nathan is worrying his little heart out. UGH! Waiting is the worst.
Ok... well there is our update.
Monday, October 22, 2012
Another Monday!!
Ahhhh... yes, another Monday! At least it is nice and sunny out. Actually, it is rather beautiful looking outside. I LOVE the fall colors that I see when I look out any of my windows. The mountains are putting on quite a show!! :-)
I know there are some that think I am crazy... for our Sasquatch hunting adventure!! I dont care. I had so much fun with Brittany yesterday! We laughed, we schemed, we just had an all around good time together. I get sad when I think that our times like that are numbered. She is getting older... I am sure she wont want to do things like that much longer... although I can hope that she will.
Josh went out on a camping adventure over the weekend. With his friend Kara!
I am so glad I took time to camp with my kids...and that they will take that into their future!
He took our tent... packed up his little car...and set out into the woods, up state... during HUNTING SEASON... UGH! Oh well, he checked in with me twice a day... so I didnt have to go looking for him...LOL! And he made it home safe yesterday evening. He is sounding a bit rough... I hope he GOES TO THE DOCTOR!!!!!!
Today we have some catching up to do on our school work. Not a real big deal. Nathan has his first therapy appt this morning!! He is looking forward to learning skills to keep him from worrying so much! I am very proud of him for being open to this.
Other than that... just another typical Monday! I hope to get out of a walk today... I got on the scale this morning and was NOT pleased with what I saw!!!! :-(
Ok... gotta get moving on with our day! We have MUCH to learn... and some sun and beautiful scenery to enjoy! :-D
I know there are some that think I am crazy... for our Sasquatch hunting adventure!! I dont care. I had so much fun with Brittany yesterday! We laughed, we schemed, we just had an all around good time together. I get sad when I think that our times like that are numbered. She is getting older... I am sure she wont want to do things like that much longer... although I can hope that she will.
Josh went out on a camping adventure over the weekend. With his friend Kara!
I am so glad I took time to camp with my kids...and that they will take that into their future!
He took our tent... packed up his little car...and set out into the woods, up state... during HUNTING SEASON... UGH! Oh well, he checked in with me twice a day... so I didnt have to go looking for him...LOL! And he made it home safe yesterday evening. He is sounding a bit rough... I hope he GOES TO THE DOCTOR!!!!!!
Today we have some catching up to do on our school work. Not a real big deal. Nathan has his first therapy appt this morning!! He is looking forward to learning skills to keep him from worrying so much! I am very proud of him for being open to this.
Other than that... just another typical Monday! I hope to get out of a walk today... I got on the scale this morning and was NOT pleased with what I saw!!!! :-(
Ok... gotta get moving on with our day! We have MUCH to learn... and some sun and beautiful scenery to enjoy! :-D
Sunday, October 21, 2012
Sasquatch Hunting...
Sooooo.... Brittany and I decided to take Gunner up to the hang glider spot today, to run and play! WELL, with the recent BigFoot sighting... we decided to turn our adventure into a Sasquatch Hunt. Of course, we recorded our time spent in the woods with step by step texts to Stacy!! LMBO
Here is the run down--
October 21st, 2012:
15:31- Squatch activity, pulling out the canine to do some tracking. Will report back later.
15:40- (after Stacy LOL'd us) This is some serious business. We are now licensed squatch hunters. No laughing out loud!
15:45- Hang glider activity. Canine spotted horse shit.
15:50- Canine succeeded in getting a sample (of horse shit)
15:55- More evidence found and photographed (squatch gloves and odd tree markings)
15:57- Note: Squatches eat fruit cups
16:11- preoccuppied by MAJOR hang glider activity. You should come up on your way thru. NOTE: canine doing great.
16:21- It's a party up here. No more squatch activity seen or noted.
16:25- There are 6 hang gliders in the sky right now.
17:00- Continuing to play fetch with Gunner
17:37- While heading home Brittany exited the truck to participate in a secret snatch and grab mission -- Code Name: FERNS! Mission was a success!
LMFAO... Let me tell you... Brittany and I had THE BEST time up in the mountain today!! :-D
Gunner did AMAZING... EVEN when the stupid guy wanted to give me the 3rd degree because I said his kid couldnt pet my dog. I explained that Gunner isnt very fond of ppl. Well, that set this asshole into a tizzy... he couldnt understand why I had a nasty dog in the mountains!! Hey douche bag... my dog was COMPLETELY under control the ENTIRE time... even when you were harassing me!!! WOOOO HOOOOO... GOOOO GUNNER!!!
I almost told him to take 2 more steps closer to me to see my dog NASTY!! But I refrained and used the situation as a learning experience for Gunner.
It did bother me for awhile tho.
OK... Sasquatch Hunter, Amy, signing off for the evening. ;-)
Here is the run down--
October 21st, 2012:
15:31- Squatch activity, pulling out the canine to do some tracking. Will report back later.
15:40- (after Stacy LOL'd us) This is some serious business. We are now licensed squatch hunters. No laughing out loud!
15:45- Hang glider activity. Canine spotted horse shit.
15:50- Canine succeeded in getting a sample (of horse shit)
15:55- More evidence found and photographed (squatch gloves and odd tree markings)
15:57- Note: Squatches eat fruit cups
16:11- preoccuppied by MAJOR hang glider activity. You should come up on your way thru. NOTE: canine doing great.
16:21- It's a party up here. No more squatch activity seen or noted.
16:25- There are 6 hang gliders in the sky right now.
17:00- Continuing to play fetch with Gunner
17:37- While heading home Brittany exited the truck to participate in a secret snatch and grab mission -- Code Name: FERNS! Mission was a success!
LMFAO... Let me tell you... Brittany and I had THE BEST time up in the mountain today!! :-D
Gunner did AMAZING... EVEN when the stupid guy wanted to give me the 3rd degree because I said his kid couldnt pet my dog. I explained that Gunner isnt very fond of ppl. Well, that set this asshole into a tizzy... he couldnt understand why I had a nasty dog in the mountains!! Hey douche bag... my dog was COMPLETELY under control the ENTIRE time... even when you were harassing me!!! WOOOO HOOOOO... GOOOO GUNNER!!!
I almost told him to take 2 more steps closer to me to see my dog NASTY!! But I refrained and used the situation as a learning experience for Gunner.
It did bother me for awhile tho.
OK... Sasquatch Hunter, Amy, signing off for the evening. ;-)
Saturday, October 20, 2012
A great time!
Our Harvest Gathering turned out to be an AWESOME evening!! I laughed way too much... my "laugh muscles" hurt today. Which is a welcomed hurt... since my back has been so bad lately! (For anyone keeping track... my bruising is a really yucky greenish/purplish now!! Ewwwww!! But I am hoping by tomorrow it wont hurt to put my brace on.)
Anyway... it was an enjoyable evening. Watching Aunt Vickie and Aunt Brenda together.... HILARIOUS. Listening to Jason and Stacy tell stories... also VERY funny! Having good company to share it all with... AMAZING!!
I wont even try to get into telling stories from last nite... it will NEVER do it justice!!!
All of the harvest goodies were yummy. I will share some recipes this week!!
I think we will definitely have to have more get togethers... and I am still stuck on a card nite or something every once in awhile!
Today the guys are hard at work on the roof. And it is an easy day for me... my house is fairly clean and laundry is mostly caught up! I will be taking it easy... hoping my back feels better... I really want to get a nice hike in this weekend! I skipped the Gratz Craft Fair today... I didnt want to do all that walking right now.
Oh, yesterday's meeting about Courtney went better than expected. We hope we are on track now and we can continue to move forward with her goals and plans. This Wednesday we go to visit HGA!!! This Tuesday she starts DRIVING LESSONS!!!
RECIPE!!!!---
1 teaspoon baking soda
1 teaspoon cinnamon
1/4 teaspoon ground ginger
1/4 teaspoon ground cloves
1/4 teaspoon ground nutmeg
1/2 teaspoon salt
1/2 Cup unsalted butter, room temp
1 Cup granulated sugar
2 large eggs
1 teaspoon pure vanilla extract
3/4 Cup solid packed, pumpkin puree
1 Cup semisweet choc chips
Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Place rack inthe middle of oven. Line 12 muffin cups with paper liners
In large bowl, sift together the flour, baking soda, ground spices and salt.
In the bowl of your electric mixer (or hand mixer), cream together the butter and sugar until light and fluffy. Add the eggs, one at a time, beating well after each addition. Beat in vanilla extract. Scrape down the sides of the bowl. With mixer on low speed, alternately add the flour mixture and the pumpkin puree, in 3 additions, beginning and ending with the flour mixture. Fold in choc chips.
Fill the muffin cups evenly with the batter (you can use an ice cream scoop for this!) Place in the oven and bake for about 18-20 minutes... or until firm to the touch and a toothpick comes out clean. Cool on wire rack.
NOTE--
You can also bake this batter in a loaf pan!!! Butter the pan first. Bake at 350 degrees for 50 - 60 minutes.
Anyway... it was an enjoyable evening. Watching Aunt Vickie and Aunt Brenda together.... HILARIOUS. Listening to Jason and Stacy tell stories... also VERY funny! Having good company to share it all with... AMAZING!!
I wont even try to get into telling stories from last nite... it will NEVER do it justice!!!
All of the harvest goodies were yummy. I will share some recipes this week!!
I think we will definitely have to have more get togethers... and I am still stuck on a card nite or something every once in awhile!
Today the guys are hard at work on the roof. And it is an easy day for me... my house is fairly clean and laundry is mostly caught up! I will be taking it easy... hoping my back feels better... I really want to get a nice hike in this weekend! I skipped the Gratz Craft Fair today... I didnt want to do all that walking right now.
Oh, yesterday's meeting about Courtney went better than expected. We hope we are on track now and we can continue to move forward with her goals and plans. This Wednesday we go to visit HGA!!! This Tuesday she starts DRIVING LESSONS!!!
RECIPE!!!!---
Pumpkin Chocolate Chip Muffins:
1 1/2 Cups of all purpose flour1 teaspoon baking soda
1 teaspoon cinnamon
1/4 teaspoon ground ginger
1/4 teaspoon ground cloves
1/4 teaspoon ground nutmeg
1/2 teaspoon salt
1/2 Cup unsalted butter, room temp
1 Cup granulated sugar
2 large eggs
1 teaspoon pure vanilla extract
3/4 Cup solid packed, pumpkin puree
1 Cup semisweet choc chips
Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Place rack inthe middle of oven. Line 12 muffin cups with paper liners
In large bowl, sift together the flour, baking soda, ground spices and salt.
In the bowl of your electric mixer (or hand mixer), cream together the butter and sugar until light and fluffy. Add the eggs, one at a time, beating well after each addition. Beat in vanilla extract. Scrape down the sides of the bowl. With mixer on low speed, alternately add the flour mixture and the pumpkin puree, in 3 additions, beginning and ending with the flour mixture. Fold in choc chips.
Fill the muffin cups evenly with the batter (you can use an ice cream scoop for this!) Place in the oven and bake for about 18-20 minutes... or until firm to the touch and a toothpick comes out clean. Cool on wire rack.
NOTE--
You can also bake this batter in a loaf pan!!! Butter the pan first. Bake at 350 degrees for 50 - 60 minutes.
Tuesday, October 16, 2012
Weekend to almost mid week!
Wow... it seems that time is just flying by! Here we are... Tuesday already!!!
The weekend was pretty good... even with the insane amount of pain I was feeling. I some how managed to screw up my back... probably working with Gunner.
Friday our roof was FINALLY delivered and we got all of the supplies we needed. AND, Stacy realized that Nathan was very much correct in saying the wheels on the big trailer werent sitting right.
Saturday Stacy and his dad got to work on the roof. Just the 2 of them. We now how scaffolding decorating the front of our house... and they did start to get the wood screwed down. I think they got 2 pieces of metal on the front part of the main roof too.
I spent most of Saturday hopped up on pain meds and muscle relaxers... but I did manage to get a NICE fire going!! Want something done right... gotta do it yourself!!
Sunday we went on another State Game Lands tour... 110, I believe. Nothing really worth writing about. I wish we would have stayed more local and did the one down by Stoney Creek.
I have made HUGE amounts of progress with my crafts! I got my pumpkin jars done and they look great!!
I also made some progress working with the Rit Dye... my first time!!! Not only did I dye some kitchen hand towels... but also some wood!!! (and yes, I meant to do it...LOL) It works WONDERFULLY!!!
I am also hard at work on new pictures in our dining room "window" frame!!! FINALLY!!!!
I have found my creativity is bursting through lately!! So much better than focusing on negative crap, I guess!
Yesterday I had my first appt with my new chiropractor!!! I NEEDED it. My back was working against me since last week... and I was MISERABLE!!
I was completely out of alignment!! He worked on me for about an hour!! I cracked and popped so many times it wasnt even funny... BUT... I was able to walk out of his office a whole lot straighter and in way less pain! Of course, the headache hit once I got home...and NOTHING was taking it away. I drank TONS of water, like I was told.
Today the head ache is gone... but I feel like I was hit by a truck. I guess that is what can be expected when you get realigned. My muscles have to remember where they are actually suppose to be and how to work there. I go back on Thursday to see if I kept my adjustments... and to make any more that may be necessary. I really hope to be back to 100% by next week!
Today I need to do some laundry and pay bills.... BLAH!!! I have 2 adorable little puppies keeping me company... so maybe it wont be so bad! LOL!! OMGoodness... these gals are gettting more and more cute!!! They are starting to play!!!!! ADORABLE!!! They are still wobbly on their paws... but they bat at eachother and try to growl and bark!
I am thinking we may start to try mushy food this week. They are starting to show interest in Ellie's food bowl!! Especially Runway... the little tubby thing. She is ALL about food...LOL!!
Ollie's mom actually asked about them. She is interested in taking one. Not sure how I feel about that. Not that she is a bad person... I always got along with her and we did a lot of stuff together. We have alot in common. I actually really miss hanging out with her. But, it is still Ollie's mom. Ah... I have time to figure it all out.
Guess I should get to work on my list for today... things get all crazy come this evening... with Jeremy Project and gymnastics.
My cuties!!
The weekend was pretty good... even with the insane amount of pain I was feeling. I some how managed to screw up my back... probably working with Gunner.
Friday our roof was FINALLY delivered and we got all of the supplies we needed. AND, Stacy realized that Nathan was very much correct in saying the wheels on the big trailer werent sitting right.
Saturday Stacy and his dad got to work on the roof. Just the 2 of them. We now how scaffolding decorating the front of our house... and they did start to get the wood screwed down. I think they got 2 pieces of metal on the front part of the main roof too.
I spent most of Saturday hopped up on pain meds and muscle relaxers... but I did manage to get a NICE fire going!! Want something done right... gotta do it yourself!!
Sunday we went on another State Game Lands tour... 110, I believe. Nothing really worth writing about. I wish we would have stayed more local and did the one down by Stoney Creek.
I have made HUGE amounts of progress with my crafts! I got my pumpkin jars done and they look great!!
I have found my creativity is bursting through lately!! So much better than focusing on negative crap, I guess!
Yesterday I had my first appt with my new chiropractor!!! I NEEDED it. My back was working against me since last week... and I was MISERABLE!!
I was completely out of alignment!! He worked on me for about an hour!! I cracked and popped so many times it wasnt even funny... BUT... I was able to walk out of his office a whole lot straighter and in way less pain! Of course, the headache hit once I got home...and NOTHING was taking it away. I drank TONS of water, like I was told.
Today the head ache is gone... but I feel like I was hit by a truck. I guess that is what can be expected when you get realigned. My muscles have to remember where they are actually suppose to be and how to work there. I go back on Thursday to see if I kept my adjustments... and to make any more that may be necessary. I really hope to be back to 100% by next week!
Today I need to do some laundry and pay bills.... BLAH!!! I have 2 adorable little puppies keeping me company... so maybe it wont be so bad! LOL!! OMGoodness... these gals are gettting more and more cute!!! They are starting to play!!!!! ADORABLE!!! They are still wobbly on their paws... but they bat at eachother and try to growl and bark!
I am thinking we may start to try mushy food this week. They are starting to show interest in Ellie's food bowl!! Especially Runway... the little tubby thing. She is ALL about food...LOL!!
Ollie's mom actually asked about them. She is interested in taking one. Not sure how I feel about that. Not that she is a bad person... I always got along with her and we did a lot of stuff together. We have alot in common. I actually really miss hanging out with her. But, it is still Ollie's mom. Ah... I have time to figure it all out.
Guess I should get to work on my list for today... things get all crazy come this evening... with Jeremy Project and gymnastics.
My cuties!!
Friday, October 12, 2012
Roof...?!?!?
So here we are... the second Friday in a row... waiting on our roof to be delivered! AND... this whole ordeal was started over 5 weeks ago!!! AND... IT IS PAID FOR!!!! I am getting cranky about it now! BUT... I am letting my hubby deal with it...he needs to "find his voice"! I just need to know so I can plan my weekend! Grrrr!!
Guess what I am doing again today? Yes... straining more pumpkin! LOL!! Added bonus- I get to bake with the pumpkin I am straining today!! :-) Pumpkin Choc Chip Muffins AND Pumpkin Cupcakes with Cream Cheese Icing!
Yesterday after Stacy got home we headed out to pick up scaffolding at Uncle Rodney's. Then we stopped for a visit at Stacy's parents.... and there was more scaffolding there. Some how the kids managed to get new slippers out of the visit! LOL!! WITH pom poms! I cant be jealous... I got a new crochet pattern while I was there! ;-) Thank you, Grammy.
After our visit we hit TSC for feed... then WalMart so I could pick up a few items I needed for baking today!
Once we got home Brittany and I headed out side... in the dark... to pick peppers. There was a freeze warning and I didnt want to lose what was out there. I have a boat load of hot peppers. If all goes well, I will be making hot pepper jelly this weekend. I have never made it before... but I am going to try it, since I have PLENTY of peppers!!! I WILL be wearing gloves, a mask and eye protection... LMBO! Those things damn near killed me last time!
We also brought in all of my potted plants last night. They are so pretty... I dont want them to die! I guess I will find space in the side kitchen for them over winter.
This morning, as I was watching Nathan do long division ON HIS OWN... I cant help but to be bubbling with pride in him!!! If you had any idea of the NIGHTMARE this task was last year... you would understand why I feel the way I do!!!! So yes, AGAIN, I say I am super proud of him!! :-D
Actually... this year ALL subjects are going pretty smooth. He is definitely becoming more mature and independent in regards to school. I am super pleased!!
Well, nothing is getting done with me just sitting here... Gotta get my butt to work!! :-)
Guess what I am doing again today? Yes... straining more pumpkin! LOL!! Added bonus- I get to bake with the pumpkin I am straining today!! :-) Pumpkin Choc Chip Muffins AND Pumpkin Cupcakes with Cream Cheese Icing!
Yesterday after Stacy got home we headed out to pick up scaffolding at Uncle Rodney's. Then we stopped for a visit at Stacy's parents.... and there was more scaffolding there. Some how the kids managed to get new slippers out of the visit! LOL!! WITH pom poms! I cant be jealous... I got a new crochet pattern while I was there! ;-) Thank you, Grammy.
After our visit we hit TSC for feed... then WalMart so I could pick up a few items I needed for baking today!
Once we got home Brittany and I headed out side... in the dark... to pick peppers. There was a freeze warning and I didnt want to lose what was out there. I have a boat load of hot peppers. If all goes well, I will be making hot pepper jelly this weekend. I have never made it before... but I am going to try it, since I have PLENTY of peppers!!! I WILL be wearing gloves, a mask and eye protection... LMBO! Those things damn near killed me last time!
We also brought in all of my potted plants last night. They are so pretty... I dont want them to die! I guess I will find space in the side kitchen for them over winter.
This morning, as I was watching Nathan do long division ON HIS OWN... I cant help but to be bubbling with pride in him!!! If you had any idea of the NIGHTMARE this task was last year... you would understand why I feel the way I do!!!! So yes, AGAIN, I say I am super proud of him!! :-D
Actually... this year ALL subjects are going pretty smooth. He is definitely becoming more mature and independent in regards to school. I am super pleased!!
Well, nothing is getting done with me just sitting here... Gotta get my butt to work!! :-)
Thursday, October 11, 2012
Busy next few days!!
The time is FINALLY here!! Our roof should be delivered today!!!
Which means tonight I have to help Stacy clear off his big trailer to haul rough cut wood from Gessner's tomorrow... AND we get to go to Uncle Rodney's to pick up scaffolding. Tomorrow we run for wood after work and start getting it attached to the roof. Saturday Stacy and his Dad start installing the roof!
I also have some baking to do tomorrow... pumpkins all being pureed and strained today. I have to come up with yummy treats (which I am thinking Pumpkin cupcakes and pumpkin choc chip muffins) for the Wic Fire Co (Brenda) to sell at Lyken's Fall Festival Saturday... and get them to her!
I also have to come up with some food for Saturday... cant have hungry guys hanging off the roof.
It will be a busy weekend... that will fly by me way too fast... grrr
Let me just say that I am a little OCD with straining pumpkin!!! OMG... I will be here all day, and all night since I have more in the crockpot now!! LOL!! I am packaging it all up in 2 Cup portions and putting it into the freezer for later use. I have A LOT of pumpkin!!
I have to get to cut my herbs back and get them into the dehydrator. Thank God for the vacuum sealer!! :-) That is one of those kitchen gadgets worth their weight in gold! LOL! That and my KitchenAid!!
I guess I will pull off whatever peppers I have left growing and call it a year for them too. Time to pull out those plants and get those beds covered up for the winter.
We actually have some really nice looking beets and carrots coming up right now too!! Those will have to wait another few weeks... I just dont have the time to deal with them right now.
I have been taking time everyday to play and work Gunner! He LOVES "our" time together... LOL!!
Ellie is starting to teach her babies to play!!! I am pretty sure I saw Runway play bowing at Gunner last night while we had them out on the bed. They are really starting to get their legs too!! They arent real steady... but boy, can they move! They are so damn adorable!!!
Ok... gotta get to getting some things finished up... THEN to pull out the Rit Dye AND ModPodge!! :-)
I have a new recipe I will be sharing tomorrow!!! PORK CHOPS!!
Which means tonight I have to help Stacy clear off his big trailer to haul rough cut wood from Gessner's tomorrow... AND we get to go to Uncle Rodney's to pick up scaffolding. Tomorrow we run for wood after work and start getting it attached to the roof. Saturday Stacy and his Dad start installing the roof!
I also have some baking to do tomorrow... pumpkins all being pureed and strained today. I have to come up with yummy treats (which I am thinking Pumpkin cupcakes and pumpkin choc chip muffins) for the Wic Fire Co (Brenda) to sell at Lyken's Fall Festival Saturday... and get them to her!
I also have to come up with some food for Saturday... cant have hungry guys hanging off the roof.
It will be a busy weekend... that will fly by me way too fast... grrr
Let me just say that I am a little OCD with straining pumpkin!!! OMG... I will be here all day, and all night since I have more in the crockpot now!! LOL!! I am packaging it all up in 2 Cup portions and putting it into the freezer for later use. I have A LOT of pumpkin!!
I have to get to cut my herbs back and get them into the dehydrator. Thank God for the vacuum sealer!! :-) That is one of those kitchen gadgets worth their weight in gold! LOL! That and my KitchenAid!!
I guess I will pull off whatever peppers I have left growing and call it a year for them too. Time to pull out those plants and get those beds covered up for the winter.
We actually have some really nice looking beets and carrots coming up right now too!! Those will have to wait another few weeks... I just dont have the time to deal with them right now.
I have been taking time everyday to play and work Gunner! He LOVES "our" time together... LOL!!
Ellie is starting to teach her babies to play!!! I am pretty sure I saw Runway play bowing at Gunner last night while we had them out on the bed. They are really starting to get their legs too!! They arent real steady... but boy, can they move! They are so damn adorable!!!
Ok... gotta get to getting some things finished up... THEN to pull out the Rit Dye AND ModPodge!! :-)
I have a new recipe I will be sharing tomorrow!!! PORK CHOPS!!
Wednesday, October 10, 2012
Fall Harvest Gathering!
Wow... I am really starting to get excited about our Fall Harvest Gathering!! I have most of the menu planned... and the kids and I started on some pretty cool crafts to have decorate! I LOVE this time of year... and I LOVE having this gathering every year!!! This year we even decided to let the kids invite a few friends.
I went out today and picked up some last minute craft supplies. I cant even remember the last time I was in walmart ALONE!!! Yep... just me. That NEVER happens!! LOL But it did today because I had an appt with Courtney and her therapist.... which turned out to be a good session! Courtney was in a pretty good mood today so things stayed upbeat and positive.
Yesterday was Britt's gymnastics day. She is doing really well with learning all of the new skills!! She is also benefiting from the extra hour of tumbling she does! They are REALLY shaping her back handspring skills. They already have her connecting 3...and she is getting better at making them "longer". AND, she attempted a back tuck last night... they pointed out what would make it better... so I am hoping they can start working on that with her.
Goodness... I am so much pumpkin to cook off!!! I am hoping to make our way through school and get to work in the kitchen... and on some crafts I have lined up! But we started today pretty late, since I had an appt and ran some errands... Soooo... time will tell!
That's all I have time for today! Hope everyone has a great day!!! ;-)
I went out today and picked up some last minute craft supplies. I cant even remember the last time I was in walmart ALONE!!! Yep... just me. That NEVER happens!! LOL But it did today because I had an appt with Courtney and her therapist.... which turned out to be a good session! Courtney was in a pretty good mood today so things stayed upbeat and positive.
Yesterday was Britt's gymnastics day. She is doing really well with learning all of the new skills!! She is also benefiting from the extra hour of tumbling she does! They are REALLY shaping her back handspring skills. They already have her connecting 3...and she is getting better at making them "longer". AND, she attempted a back tuck last night... they pointed out what would make it better... so I am hoping they can start working on that with her.
Goodness... I am so much pumpkin to cook off!!! I am hoping to make our way through school and get to work in the kitchen... and on some crafts I have lined up! But we started today pretty late, since I had an appt and ran some errands... Soooo... time will tell!
That's all I have time for today! Hope everyone has a great day!!! ;-)
Tuesday, October 9, 2012
10 Great Ways to Be An Unhappy Mom
I have to share this. This blog was written over at "All Things Mothering"... By: Beth Berry
I think it is a great blog!!
I think it is a great blog!!
Over the years, I have pinpointed a few behaviors that — though
widely accepted and even promoted by popular culture — simply don’t
serve me. Changing these behaviors is a process and one that requires both a willingness to take personal responsibility for our choices and a continuous countercultural commitment to creating our lives by a truer, though “less convenient” set of standards.
However inconvenient, these subtle shifts sure have made for better living in my experience — that is, once I sorted through the mainstream confussion surrounding what makes for good living.
10 Great Ways to Be an Unhappy Mom
However inconvenient, these subtle shifts sure have made for better living in my experience — that is, once I sorted through the mainstream confussion surrounding what makes for good living.
10 Great Ways to Be an Unhappy Mom
- Believe that you must have it all now. This one is running rampant through our culture, creating discontent within every demographic. Because we are suddenly aware of the existence of millions of products, experiences and ways to “improve” upon our lives, because millions of dollars are spent annually to creatively convince us that we need that which we’re suddenly aware of AND because instant gratification is now assumed and expected, it’s easy to see how we’ve become totally caught up in this defeating mentality. It is equally present within the mainstay of motherhood. We are taught that we can have careers, babies, balance within our homes, bigger homes, more time with our spouses, more organized closets, physical fitness, money in savings and vacations to counter the chaos (to name a few) ALL AT ONCE. Then, in an attempt to manage impossible loads (or ease our guilt for having failed to do so), we consume — because according to the ones spending the millions, that will solve the problem. Guess who wins in this vicious cycle?
- Compare yourself to other mothers (including your own). You are your own unique version of motherhood. No one right way exists to raise children. Just as comparing our bodies to the photoshopped depictions of the “perfect” woman distorts our sense of beauty and perception of what is desirable or even possible, comparing ourselves to other mothers — the lives of whom are either totally fictitious (instant bliss upon the uncapping of a bottle of laundry detergent), largely made up by our wild imaginations (“so and so” has it “all together”) or comparisons of apples to oranges (remembering your mother’s home when you were a teenager and comparing it to your current home full of babies) — leaves us senselessly unsatisfied and seeking contentment where it can never be found.
- Base your contentment on the state of your house. I like a tidy house. I feel more on top of my game, at ease and productive once it is relatively “clean.” But I would have gone insane (and taken everyone with me) if I held onto the idea that I could only be content once everything was “in its place.” Kids exist to dispel this notion. Likewise, feeling the need to apologize for the state of things upon welcoming unannounced visitors is like saying, “I’m sorry you have to see that we live in this house.” The notion that homes must look like display windows before they are presentable to guests is a crying shame in a culture so starved for community.
- Allow “them” to dictate your priorities. Every time we walk into a store, open a magazine, hop on the highway or turn on the tv, we are bombarded with images that shape our perspective on what’s important. Even seemingly harmless sites such as Pinterest can leave us wanting and wishing when we’d been hoping for inspiration. For more on this subject, head to my blog and check out my most popular post to-date, Let’s All Compare Our Perfect Lives and Then Try to Enjoy Our Day.
- Build stories based upon unevaluated “truths.” So much of the misery we experience in life is based not upon actual occurrences, but the stories we create about things that might happen (which we can’t predict) or could have happened differently (which we can’t change). Byron Katie’s Loving What Is is a must-read if this is something you struggle with.
- Play the martyr role. There are few more direct roads to resentment (both resenting and being resented) than behaving as if your own needs are of little importance compared to the never-ending demands of your family. Statements such as, “I can’t go to the party. I have to stay home to nurse the baby,” are about worthless for encouraging the sense of empathy you are likely needing in that moment. Learning to be an effective communicator will benefit you as much as your relationships.
- Make decisions based on guilt. We often say “yes” to commitments, not because we have a genuine interest in them, but because we have not yet learned to honor our own personal balance over other peoples’ perception of us (or what we think they think). Protecting ourselves from overcommitments is not selfish, it’s just plain smart.
- Stay isolated for the sake of “independence.” Though just about everything in modern (US) culture tells us otherwise, I do not believe we are intended to go it alone as mothers. We are not stronger because we “don’t need help,” nor are we weaker when we ask. Women all over the world raise children together, and have been since the beginning of time. Creating community in our car-dependent, single-family-household society is no easy task, but one that I believe to be essential in any conversation regarding the support of motherhood and the betterment of this country.
- Believe that you’ll be happier when_____. “I’ll be happier when my kids are out of diapers.” “I’ll be happier when we have more monthly income.” “I’ll be happier when the washing machine is replaced, when the husband comes home from work, or when my kitchen has been remodeled.” Really? Will you? How can you be so sure? We have no idea what tomorrow (or next hour) will bring. Deferring happiness until some hypothetical future experience only serves to rob you of the only happiness that truly exists — that which is available in this moment.
- Allow “busy” to become your default answer to, “How are you?” Busy does not equal fulfilled. Busy does not equal valuable nor important. The quality of your experiences is more important than the quantity. Feel like no matter how busy, you never quite do enough? I’ve got a post for that, too. Reword your everyday accomplishments and realize just how productive you really are.
What a weekend!!
We had a pretty awesome weekend!!
Stacy and Brittany REALLY enjoyed their whitewater rafting adventure... and are ready to take on bigger rapids!! They said it was a great experience, and they are glad they went. The picture they brought home is pretty cool!! I am super glad they had a good time.
We all spent Friday night at camp. We got there late, so we didnt have any time to do much other than get our bed ready and go to sleep. Which was fine with me!! I was exhausted.
Saturday morning, after breakfast, we headed out for a nice hike. We decided to stay on the roads and not take any trails... since it was hunting season. We still managed to make the most out of our adventure! Gunner enjoyed fetching sticks... he got to explore the woods some... since I cant throw straight to save my soul! LOL!
Brittany found a leaf with a heart shape missing... we had fun trying to incorporate that leaf into our pictures. The mountains are so insanely beautiful this time of year... I LOVE IT!!
After our walk, we packed up and headed to the Black Forest Inn for late lunch... before he headed out. I laughed so damn hard!!! A giant spider (Halloween decoration) jumped out and scared the shit out of my grandmother... LMAO! I thought she was going to have a heart attack!!! Then both of my grandparents and Courtney ordered Chef Salads.... I have NEVER in my entire life saw such a HUGE salad!!!! It was layered in more 'stuff'... french fries, 2 subs worth of meats, veggies, macaroni, croutons... I was beginning to wonder if it had any lettuce!!! CRAZY!!! My grandmother couldnt figure out how to even eat it. She just kept moving stuff from one spot to the next! No one finished their salad... I am thinking it lasted them all at least 2 more meals!!
Once we were on the road, we decided to take a swing through Forksville. We stopped to see if Stacy's parents were up the camp they stayed out over the weekend... but missed them. (They were out eating at my all time favorite place!!) Then we hit an overlook, which has lots of good memories for us. Then finally decided to call it a day and head home.
Sunday we picked a State Game Land tour and headed out. I LOVE with they open the roads for driving tours! There is NO WAY I would ever be able to hike the entire roads or trails to see all of the awesome things to see... they are just tooooo long!
So, we set out on a 14 mile off road adventure! We were surrounded by JEEPS... which was kinda creepy... but we managed. The scenery was AMAZING!!! Nature is awesome. Even tho I take TONS of pictures... no photograph could every do it justice. Mother Nature is amazing.
After we did the tour... we swung up through Forksville again... just because we were close. WE WILL LIVE THERE SOME DAY!! ;-)
Yesterday I had the house to myself. Gunner had training. He did great... I have some more to learn. LOL
I am constantly impressed with the intelligence of this dog. I am anxious to see how far we can take it... once I get more comfortable with this training style and make some adaptations for my own "disabilities"...
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
So as everyone knows the past few weeks have been "interesting" for me.
I am dealing with a bunch of different things...and starting to see things in a whole new light.
I have a bunch of things to figure out... like how I allowed myself to get sucked so far in to something so twisted and negative. AND... what was truth and what was just bullshit to drum up some drama...and sit back and watch the "show". I have held onto so much anger... and now, all of a sudden, with a break from the negativity... I am finding that it is GONE!
When a person has to go through all of the steps to create an entire 2nd FB account... just to keep up with who is doing what... There is a problem!!! WHO DOES THAT!?!?! If ppl delete and block you... there is a reason!!! Just let them go!!! (I have been deleted and blocked by many... and I dont give a rat's ass!! But I know... there is a certain someone who just deleted and blocked me... that will still TROLL my blogs, because I wont add unknown ppl to my FB) Why go thru all of that shit to remain in their drama?!?!? THEN, constantly want to dwell on it... OMG... NOT HEALTHY!!!!
Getting caught up in a person that does that... yea, not healthy for me either!!! I found it IMPOSSIBLE to let things roll off my back. The constant dwelling and stewing.... OMG... so not worth it. There is an entire part of life I blocked out and avoided... all because of "he said, she said" shit... and NOW, I wonder if any of it was even true!!!
I dont care if ppl like me... I dont care if ppl want to see Stacy with someone else... I dont care if ppl did certain things to "poke" at me... I DONT CARE!!! Stacy and I are together... we are both happy... we enjoy eachother's company... we are exactly what the other needed!!! Ppl can talk all the shit they want... I DONT NEED TO KNOW ABOUT IT!!! Unless of course they want to come directly to ME and say it... then, of course, I will gladly listen.
Now that I hit my breaking point... and started to "bad react" (which I dont really think I did)... there was so much bullshit. But whatever.
I can only imagine what negative things were said about me ... and my needy kids. But ya know what... I love my kids... I love having my kids participate in things with me. I love that they are also my friends. I would be lost without them!! There is nothing wrong with that.
Yes, because my kids have different "needs"... somethings need to be tailored to make it easier for them... and at times harder on me. I am their mom... it is my job. That means more work for me... yep, and they are worth it.
I cant justify NOT doing tasks to help them cope with day to day life... just so that it isnt more work for me!! Life will always be difficult for them... and they will learn to cope in their own way... but for now... I will help them in whatever way I can! And I will continue to PULL them out of the shell they try so hard to hide it!
I am so frustrated... and angry. There are reasons I dont trust ppl.... HELLO... here they are!
OK... time to get back to making my kids life easier!! We have math to to conquer!! And I have smiles to watch... self esteem to build... lives to mold! :-D
Stacy and Brittany REALLY enjoyed their whitewater rafting adventure... and are ready to take on bigger rapids!! They said it was a great experience, and they are glad they went. The picture they brought home is pretty cool!! I am super glad they had a good time.
We all spent Friday night at camp. We got there late, so we didnt have any time to do much other than get our bed ready and go to sleep. Which was fine with me!! I was exhausted.
Saturday morning, after breakfast, we headed out for a nice hike. We decided to stay on the roads and not take any trails... since it was hunting season. We still managed to make the most out of our adventure! Gunner enjoyed fetching sticks... he got to explore the woods some... since I cant throw straight to save my soul! LOL!
Brittany found a leaf with a heart shape missing... we had fun trying to incorporate that leaf into our pictures. The mountains are so insanely beautiful this time of year... I LOVE IT!!
After our walk, we packed up and headed to the Black Forest Inn for late lunch... before he headed out. I laughed so damn hard!!! A giant spider (Halloween decoration) jumped out and scared the shit out of my grandmother... LMAO! I thought she was going to have a heart attack!!! Then both of my grandparents and Courtney ordered Chef Salads.... I have NEVER in my entire life saw such a HUGE salad!!!! It was layered in more 'stuff'... french fries, 2 subs worth of meats, veggies, macaroni, croutons... I was beginning to wonder if it had any lettuce!!! CRAZY!!! My grandmother couldnt figure out how to even eat it. She just kept moving stuff from one spot to the next! No one finished their salad... I am thinking it lasted them all at least 2 more meals!!
Once we were on the road, we decided to take a swing through Forksville. We stopped to see if Stacy's parents were up the camp they stayed out over the weekend... but missed them. (They were out eating at my all time favorite place!!) Then we hit an overlook, which has lots of good memories for us. Then finally decided to call it a day and head home.
Sunday we picked a State Game Land tour and headed out. I LOVE with they open the roads for driving tours! There is NO WAY I would ever be able to hike the entire roads or trails to see all of the awesome things to see... they are just tooooo long!
So, we set out on a 14 mile off road adventure! We were surrounded by JEEPS... which was kinda creepy... but we managed. The scenery was AMAZING!!! Nature is awesome. Even tho I take TONS of pictures... no photograph could every do it justice. Mother Nature is amazing.
After we did the tour... we swung up through Forksville again... just because we were close. WE WILL LIVE THERE SOME DAY!! ;-)
Yesterday I had the house to myself. Gunner had training. He did great... I have some more to learn. LOL
I am constantly impressed with the intelligence of this dog. I am anxious to see how far we can take it... once I get more comfortable with this training style and make some adaptations for my own "disabilities"...
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
So as everyone knows the past few weeks have been "interesting" for me.
I am dealing with a bunch of different things...and starting to see things in a whole new light.
I have a bunch of things to figure out... like how I allowed myself to get sucked so far in to something so twisted and negative. AND... what was truth and what was just bullshit to drum up some drama...and sit back and watch the "show". I have held onto so much anger... and now, all of a sudden, with a break from the negativity... I am finding that it is GONE!
When a person has to go through all of the steps to create an entire 2nd FB account... just to keep up with who is doing what... There is a problem!!! WHO DOES THAT!?!?! If ppl delete and block you... there is a reason!!! Just let them go!!! (I have been deleted and blocked by many... and I dont give a rat's ass!! But I know... there is a certain someone who just deleted and blocked me... that will still TROLL my blogs, because I wont add unknown ppl to my FB) Why go thru all of that shit to remain in their drama?!?!? THEN, constantly want to dwell on it... OMG... NOT HEALTHY!!!!
Getting caught up in a person that does that... yea, not healthy for me either!!! I found it IMPOSSIBLE to let things roll off my back. The constant dwelling and stewing.... OMG... so not worth it. There is an entire part of life I blocked out and avoided... all because of "he said, she said" shit... and NOW, I wonder if any of it was even true!!!
I dont care if ppl like me... I dont care if ppl want to see Stacy with someone else... I dont care if ppl did certain things to "poke" at me... I DONT CARE!!! Stacy and I are together... we are both happy... we enjoy eachother's company... we are exactly what the other needed!!! Ppl can talk all the shit they want... I DONT NEED TO KNOW ABOUT IT!!! Unless of course they want to come directly to ME and say it... then, of course, I will gladly listen.
Now that I hit my breaking point... and started to "bad react" (which I dont really think I did)... there was so much bullshit. But whatever.
I can only imagine what negative things were said about me ... and my needy kids. But ya know what... I love my kids... I love having my kids participate in things with me. I love that they are also my friends. I would be lost without them!! There is nothing wrong with that.
Yes, because my kids have different "needs"... somethings need to be tailored to make it easier for them... and at times harder on me. I am their mom... it is my job. That means more work for me... yep, and they are worth it.
I cant justify NOT doing tasks to help them cope with day to day life... just so that it isnt more work for me!! Life will always be difficult for them... and they will learn to cope in their own way... but for now... I will help them in whatever way I can! And I will continue to PULL them out of the shell they try so hard to hide it!
I am so frustrated... and angry. There are reasons I dont trust ppl.... HELLO... here they are!
OK... time to get back to making my kids life easier!! We have math to to conquer!! And I have smiles to watch... self esteem to build... lives to mold! :-D
Friday, October 5, 2012
A quick update...
So I havent really been keeping everyone updated with what we have going on. I have only been sharing the things I have swirling around in my head.
Yesterday was another rather productive day! I have found that when I leave my cell phone sitting next to my bed all day... I am A LOT less distracted!! I have the ability to better focus on what is important... teaching my kids, training my dogs, grooming, working on projects in my house... etc!
I have also lost a boat load of negativity. The saying, "What you dont know wont hurt ya"... yea... completely true! There are reasons I block ppl from my life, my email, my FB page. Because their actions and the energy that they create are toxic. I enjoy the peace I get from not getting caught up in gossip and stories. Although, I must admit, it is sometimes fun...but still toxic, and not something I can deal with every day.
Last week was a real eye opening week for me. Tomorrow is never promised. I only have these kids with me for so long... and I need to do the best I can do to make the most of the time we do have together! I think my life and my priorities got a bit out of whack ... and I am doing all I can to sort it all out and get things back in order.
I am BLESSED with the opportunity to stay home and teach my kids. THAT is why I am home. My sole purpose!! They arent "bothering" me or being less independent when they need or ask for my help. It is my responsibility to be here for them and show them they way. There will be a day when they no longer need me or want to ask me anything... I dont know how I really feel about that.
Yesterday was such an amazing day! After a year of struggling with long division... we FINALLY found a way to make it click for Nathan!!! I am so happy... and so proud of him!! The look in his eyes and seeing him proud of himself was AWESOME! I am so glad I got to experience that with him.
I am no better than anyone else. I make my fair share of mistakes. I dont need to get annoyed with other ppls mistakes! Why not take the opportunity to lend a hand... and show some support. That is what I would like when it is my turn to screw up!! And boy, I screw up!!
My biggest screw up is being sucked into drama that doesnt even concern me... if even just to chit chat about it. I sit and judge. Who the hell am I to judge?!? Granted... it is obvious that some ppl just dont have their head on straight... and they may never. But is it directly affecting me? NOPE! Is it any of my damn business? NOPE! Can I do anything about it? NOPE! Will they ever change? Probably Not! Soooo... who really cares!!! From this point on... NOT ME!!
I have obviously had a fairly shitty past week. I lost my awesome dog... I've been sick... I blew out my eardrum...
I dont think it is the Universe telling me to "listen more and bad react less"...
I dont think I have "bad react"ed at all lately. I just have stopped taking part in the crap. I dont think I reacted badly in any way to the situations that were dealt to me... I am not a person to bite my tongue. I reacted appropriately given the information I was given.
I think the Universe is telling me to get moving on a more positive and productive lifestyle... with less gossip and drama and to mind my own business and to stop judging others!!!
I didnt need the crap this week... it was my breaking point. And now I will move forward in the best way I see fit. Staying positive and uplifting to all who are around me.
No more wasting energy... it just isnt healthy.
Today 2 of my kids head off to the cabin with my grandparents for the weekend... while the other goes on an adventure with Stacy... then we will join everyone at the cabin. The kids are staying until Monday... Stacy and I are only staying a night.
Gunner gets the rest of his shots today... Oh the joy!! LOL Then I get to enjoy some peace and quiet in my house while doing some grooming...I hope the dogs like my choice of music!! ;-)
Am I in a "bubble"... yea, some could say that. I dont really see it that way. I see it as being peaceful and enjoying some time ALONE! That doesnt make me depressed... or mental. It makes me HUMAN!
As I sit back and think this week. I AM TRULY HAPPY!! I am happy with my husband.. 95% of the time. LOL (He would probably say the same about me... and I am ok with it!) We dont have a perfect marriage... but who does?!?! We are drawn to eachother for a reason... because we are exactly what the other needs to have balance. We enjoy spending time together... We love our family adventures... My husband chooses to spend time with me and the kids. In the big picture... THAT is what it is all about!
I am blessed with 4 awesome kids!!! They are kids... they screw up... that is how they learn. I wish some would learn a bit faster... but in the big picture, my kids are amazing!! I have 1 who graduated high school... 1 about to graduate high school (and kicking ass "owning" her autism... I am super proud of her accomplishments!)... I have an awesome 14 yr old and 10 yr old, both following their own paths and making pretty damn good choices thus far. I am NOT a grandmother yet. My kids dont smoke, drink or do drugs... they arent out breaking any major laws (ok, traffic laws are a bit rough for one of my kids... but also my husband, so I will blame that on Stacy! LOL!!)
As I see it... I have to be doing things at least partially right! And I want to keep it up!!
(That isnt me having my head up my butt... it is me re-aligning life and making some changes)
I am blessed with a great home... (shitty neighbors that keep me focused on what I NEVER want to become)... We have family who would be there for us in a heartbeat if we needed them, even if we didnt needed them... We live a good life, we can pay our bills, our kids have everything they need (and most of what they want)... And soon we will have that metal roof my husband has wanted to badly!! LOL!
We are in a good place... and I am forever thankful!!
Ok... I think my rant here is pretty much done. Time to get my kids fed and packed up. Spend some more time on clutter control (I have a stack of mail that needs dealt with and tossed out)... because my kids cant even think right when they are living in chaos...and neither can I!!! Once again... I will profess my love for FlyLady... the routines that may be "boring"... but sooo worth sticking with, and allow me to have peace of mind and a house that doesnt completely embarrass me...most of the time! LOL
I hope everyone enjoys their day... it is suppose to be beautiful out today!!
I also pray for a safe rafting trip for Stacy and Britt... during their father/daughter bonding time. A safe trip up north for my grandparents and kids... Oh... and that Gunner doesnt eat anyone while we are at the Vet!! I guess this will be a true test of our new training!!!
Yesterday was another rather productive day! I have found that when I leave my cell phone sitting next to my bed all day... I am A LOT less distracted!! I have the ability to better focus on what is important... teaching my kids, training my dogs, grooming, working on projects in my house... etc!
I have also lost a boat load of negativity. The saying, "What you dont know wont hurt ya"... yea... completely true! There are reasons I block ppl from my life, my email, my FB page. Because their actions and the energy that they create are toxic. I enjoy the peace I get from not getting caught up in gossip and stories. Although, I must admit, it is sometimes fun...but still toxic, and not something I can deal with every day.
Last week was a real eye opening week for me. Tomorrow is never promised. I only have these kids with me for so long... and I need to do the best I can do to make the most of the time we do have together! I think my life and my priorities got a bit out of whack ... and I am doing all I can to sort it all out and get things back in order.
I am BLESSED with the opportunity to stay home and teach my kids. THAT is why I am home. My sole purpose!! They arent "bothering" me or being less independent when they need or ask for my help. It is my responsibility to be here for them and show them they way. There will be a day when they no longer need me or want to ask me anything... I dont know how I really feel about that.
Yesterday was such an amazing day! After a year of struggling with long division... we FINALLY found a way to make it click for Nathan!!! I am so happy... and so proud of him!! The look in his eyes and seeing him proud of himself was AWESOME! I am so glad I got to experience that with him.
I am no better than anyone else. I make my fair share of mistakes. I dont need to get annoyed with other ppls mistakes! Why not take the opportunity to lend a hand... and show some support. That is what I would like when it is my turn to screw up!! And boy, I screw up!!
My biggest screw up is being sucked into drama that doesnt even concern me... if even just to chit chat about it. I sit and judge. Who the hell am I to judge?!? Granted... it is obvious that some ppl just dont have their head on straight... and they may never. But is it directly affecting me? NOPE! Is it any of my damn business? NOPE! Can I do anything about it? NOPE! Will they ever change? Probably Not! Soooo... who really cares!!! From this point on... NOT ME!!
I have obviously had a fairly shitty past week. I lost my awesome dog... I've been sick... I blew out my eardrum...
I dont think it is the Universe telling me to "listen more and bad react less"...
I dont think I have "bad react"ed at all lately. I just have stopped taking part in the crap. I dont think I reacted badly in any way to the situations that were dealt to me... I am not a person to bite my tongue. I reacted appropriately given the information I was given.
I think the Universe is telling me to get moving on a more positive and productive lifestyle... with less gossip and drama and to mind my own business and to stop judging others!!!
I didnt need the crap this week... it was my breaking point. And now I will move forward in the best way I see fit. Staying positive and uplifting to all who are around me.
No more wasting energy... it just isnt healthy.
Today 2 of my kids head off to the cabin with my grandparents for the weekend... while the other goes on an adventure with Stacy... then we will join everyone at the cabin. The kids are staying until Monday... Stacy and I are only staying a night.
Gunner gets the rest of his shots today... Oh the joy!! LOL Then I get to enjoy some peace and quiet in my house while doing some grooming...I hope the dogs like my choice of music!! ;-)
Am I in a "bubble"... yea, some could say that. I dont really see it that way. I see it as being peaceful and enjoying some time ALONE! That doesnt make me depressed... or mental. It makes me HUMAN!
As I sit back and think this week. I AM TRULY HAPPY!! I am happy with my husband.. 95% of the time. LOL (He would probably say the same about me... and I am ok with it!) We dont have a perfect marriage... but who does?!?! We are drawn to eachother for a reason... because we are exactly what the other needs to have balance. We enjoy spending time together... We love our family adventures... My husband chooses to spend time with me and the kids. In the big picture... THAT is what it is all about!
I am blessed with 4 awesome kids!!! They are kids... they screw up... that is how they learn. I wish some would learn a bit faster... but in the big picture, my kids are amazing!! I have 1 who graduated high school... 1 about to graduate high school (and kicking ass "owning" her autism... I am super proud of her accomplishments!)... I have an awesome 14 yr old and 10 yr old, both following their own paths and making pretty damn good choices thus far. I am NOT a grandmother yet. My kids dont smoke, drink or do drugs... they arent out breaking any major laws (ok, traffic laws are a bit rough for one of my kids... but also my husband, so I will blame that on Stacy! LOL!!)
As I see it... I have to be doing things at least partially right! And I want to keep it up!!
(That isnt me having my head up my butt... it is me re-aligning life and making some changes)
I am blessed with a great home... (shitty neighbors that keep me focused on what I NEVER want to become)... We have family who would be there for us in a heartbeat if we needed them, even if we didnt needed them... We live a good life, we can pay our bills, our kids have everything they need (and most of what they want)... And soon we will have that metal roof my husband has wanted to badly!! LOL!
We are in a good place... and I am forever thankful!!
Ok... I think my rant here is pretty much done. Time to get my kids fed and packed up. Spend some more time on clutter control (I have a stack of mail that needs dealt with and tossed out)... because my kids cant even think right when they are living in chaos...and neither can I!!! Once again... I will profess my love for FlyLady... the routines that may be "boring"... but sooo worth sticking with, and allow me to have peace of mind and a house that doesnt completely embarrass me...most of the time! LOL
I hope everyone enjoys their day... it is suppose to be beautiful out today!!
I also pray for a safe rafting trip for Stacy and Britt... during their father/daughter bonding time. A safe trip up north for my grandparents and kids... Oh... and that Gunner doesnt eat anyone while we are at the Vet!! I guess this will be a true test of our new training!!!
Thursday, October 4, 2012
More reflecting... Another list...
As I sit and look back over my life... I realize that all of the good I have in my life right now... are all a result of changes I have made in my past.
I have never really been a huge fan of change. Like many ppl, I have fought change tooth and nail!! I have always liked my "comfort zone" and prefered to stay in it.
BUT... over the past few days... I am really seeing that once I muster up the courage to make a change, as my history has shown, things always end up better!!
Soooo... as per what I have been doing all week... I started a "list"... of how "CHANGE" can/has benefited me. This way, whenever I try to resist change... I have a reminder of why it is good!!!
(I am needing this list right now... as I am trying really hard to make some changes... and with the baby steps I am taking, I am already seeing positive results)
*PERSONAL GROWTH This one is my favorite. Change allows me to grow and learn. I discover new aspects of who I am. And even if a change doesnt get me to exactly where I wanted to be... it taught me a lesson or two in the process.
*FLEXIBILITY Making changes often, leads me to be more flexible and adapt to new situations better each time...expecially when something unexpected happens.
*IMPROVEMENT I am always looking for ways to improve... my life, our situation, my home, etc None of it would happen without "change"
*VALUES Change always forces me to take a look at myself and my life... a different perspective sometimes... which helps me to reevaluate my values.
*THE TRICKLE DOWN EFFECT Big, huge changes are difficult for me... soooo one small change will lead to another and another... eventually I will get to where I want to be.
*STRENGTH Not all changes lead to a big, happy picture... they can sometimes bring a few hardships. Lord knows I have had my fair share. But what doesnt kill me makes me stronger!!
*OPPORTUNITIES I dont have a crystal ball. I have no idea what is around every turn. What I do know is that every turn I make there will be new and exciting experiences and opportunities.
*NEW BEGINNINGS Change = The closing of one chapter and the opening of a new chapter.
*ROUTINE Well, after awhile routines get boring and make life uninteresting. I sure dont want that!
I have never really been a huge fan of change. Like many ppl, I have fought change tooth and nail!! I have always liked my "comfort zone" and prefered to stay in it.
BUT... over the past few days... I am really seeing that once I muster up the courage to make a change, as my history has shown, things always end up better!!
Soooo... as per what I have been doing all week... I started a "list"... of how "CHANGE" can/has benefited me. This way, whenever I try to resist change... I have a reminder of why it is good!!!
(I am needing this list right now... as I am trying really hard to make some changes... and with the baby steps I am taking, I am already seeing positive results)
*PERSONAL GROWTH This one is my favorite. Change allows me to grow and learn. I discover new aspects of who I am. And even if a change doesnt get me to exactly where I wanted to be... it taught me a lesson or two in the process.
*FLEXIBILITY Making changes often, leads me to be more flexible and adapt to new situations better each time...expecially when something unexpected happens.
*IMPROVEMENT I am always looking for ways to improve... my life, our situation, my home, etc None of it would happen without "change"
*VALUES Change always forces me to take a look at myself and my life... a different perspective sometimes... which helps me to reevaluate my values.
*THE TRICKLE DOWN EFFECT Big, huge changes are difficult for me... soooo one small change will lead to another and another... eventually I will get to where I want to be.
*STRENGTH Not all changes lead to a big, happy picture... they can sometimes bring a few hardships. Lord knows I have had my fair share. But what doesnt kill me makes me stronger!!
*OPPORTUNITIES I dont have a crystal ball. I have no idea what is around every turn. What I do know is that every turn I make there will be new and exciting experiences and opportunities.
*NEW BEGINNINGS Change = The closing of one chapter and the opening of a new chapter.
*ROUTINE Well, after awhile routines get boring and make life uninteresting. I sure dont want that!
Wednesday, October 3, 2012
Some things to realize and accept...
I have come to some sort of place in life... where I am spending A
LOT of time time just thinking. I know it all stems from losing my
beloved Amaruq. I havent been taking it very well... I know. BUT, it
has brought me to where I sit right now. At a point where I am ready
for things to be different... and I am ready to make the changes
needed.
Anyway... just some things I have realized and jotted down over the past few days of thinking...
* Beauty cannot be defined
* Perfection cannot be obtained (and it’s boring anyway)
* Love will be messy at times
* Other people will judge (who cares!)
* Sometimes there is no right or wrong
* No one else knows what’s right for us
* Tomorrow is uncertain
* There are things we don’t know (And there are things we don’t know that we don’t know! Crazy thought!)
* No other person can make us feel whole
* We can’t change other people
* There are some things we can’t change about ourselves (I will always have a fractured spine and have blue eyes!!)
* Sometimes there are gifts in the things we want to change (Because of my fractured spine... I wont kill myself being stupid on a motorcycle!!)
* We are worthy, just as we are (each and every one of us! Dont let anyone tell you different!!)
* We are going to age
* We are more than any one role. (We aren’t one-dimensional, and we don’t have to be...I’m multifaceted and owning it!)
* We are going to redefine ourselves
* We will occasionally have to do things we don’t want to do
* We will hurt at times (Pain is inevitable)
* We will mess up at times
* People won’t always forgive us
* Peace is forgiving ourselves
* We won’t always like the consequences of our actions
* We always have a choice in how we respond to what happens (No matter what our circumstances, we can choose what we do with them. We can decide it’s the end of the world, or start fresh)
* We are never alone
* We will lose things and people we love (but we can gain something from every loss)
* Everything is cyclical (For every pain, there will be pleasure... Nothing stays the same)
* There are some things we may never understand (life is a mystery)
* The worst that could possibly happen may happen
* The worst that could possibly happen might not be that bad
* We may not get everything we think we want ("wants" are ever changing anyway)
* Everything we do matters
Anyway... just some things I have realized and jotted down over the past few days of thinking...
* Beauty cannot be defined
* Perfection cannot be obtained (and it’s boring anyway)
* Love will be messy at times
* Other people will judge (who cares!)
* Sometimes there is no right or wrong
* No one else knows what’s right for us
* Tomorrow is uncertain
* There are things we don’t know (And there are things we don’t know that we don’t know! Crazy thought!)
* No other person can make us feel whole
* We can’t change other people
* There are some things we can’t change about ourselves (I will always have a fractured spine and have blue eyes!!)
* Sometimes there are gifts in the things we want to change (Because of my fractured spine... I wont kill myself being stupid on a motorcycle!!)
* We are worthy, just as we are (each and every one of us! Dont let anyone tell you different!!)
* We are going to age
* We are more than any one role. (We aren’t one-dimensional, and we don’t have to be...I’m multifaceted and owning it!)
* We are going to redefine ourselves
* We will occasionally have to do things we don’t want to do
* We will hurt at times (Pain is inevitable)
* We will mess up at times
* People won’t always forgive us
* Peace is forgiving ourselves
* We won’t always like the consequences of our actions
* We always have a choice in how we respond to what happens (No matter what our circumstances, we can choose what we do with them. We can decide it’s the end of the world, or start fresh)
* We are never alone
* We will lose things and people we love (but we can gain something from every loss)
* Everything is cyclical (For every pain, there will be pleasure... Nothing stays the same)
* There are some things we may never understand (life is a mystery)
* The worst that could possibly happen may happen
* The worst that could possibly happen might not be that bad
* We may not get everything we think we want ("wants" are ever changing anyway)
* Everything we do matters
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